Well, at least I can get by on the smart & funny requirements 
Woo hoo! 
You can work summers and winters at some campuses, as well as spring and fall. It’s an hourly wage for many PTs, though, so you’d have to calculate it at Whichever College/University. I recommend supplemental work too.
Addendum: I have a Master’s, not a Ph.D. They don’t seem to help much around here, though. I really think that being in your 20s or 30s is a plus, though there have been some exceptions.
Well aren’t you just too sweet?
Honestly, I joke about the cleavage but it doesn’t bother me that much, I’m happy with what I have. If I wasn’t I’d either have to have surgery or gain a lot of weight, and I’m not willing to do either.
I love you, marry me.
I don’t even particularly like Led Zeppelin and I only guess that you’re a man based on the “shirt and tie” part of the post but damnit, that’s style and not what half the people in the office with me today have on! (There’s about 200 people here, before anybody decides I must be alone with my shadow)
I’m a 20 year old guy.
I’ve watched the entire series of Gilmore Girls (except I gave up halfway through Season 7, it was so disappointing).
And The Nanny.
I am convinced all that I have in my life came from dumb luck. I honestly consider myself the third luckiest man in the world. (My Father was luckier than me, when he died up, I moved up to number three.)
I brood. I fall into melancholia easily and contemplate my mortality and morality. Oddly I find that the idea of death is strangely comforting.
I believe in God due to faith. (Faith, the belief in things not seen.) I do not understand how smart people can not see that science tells how, but theology tries to tell us who and why.
I am fairly certain I am a worse-than-average driver.
Despite it all. I am generally happy.
See what you did, Telperien? Pretty soon we may have have another “I just watched Firefly for the first time! That was amazing!” thread over in CS.
Will gaining weight give a woman large breasts? I know a lot of overweight women with very small breasts, particularly in comparison to their bellies.
My confession; I love drama, even though I try to stay out of it.
At work, I love when a big gossipy drama is going on around me. I eat it up, while never actually contributing…just being nosy, trying to hear all about it.
Same thing on the Dope. I love the train wreck threads, and I seek out threads that have trainwreck potential. ( autism/vaccination, cat declawing, etc…)
One more confession…I can’t read the whole threads when I am here at work, but I can’t resist posting. So sorry if others have already mentioned my confessions.
So you only buy weed from your enemies?
This thread is fascinating to me. Do any of you (particularly those who have posted pictures either here or in a picture thread) wonder if people from ‘real life’ will be able to identify you? Maybe I’m overly-cautious, but in my life, that’s better than under-cautious.
That said, sometimes I worry that I favor one of my kids over the other. 
Not necessarily, but it will certainly make what’s there larger.
Not speaking from experience, but I think it’s normal if you have two or more kids to worry about this.
If it makes you feel any better, sometimes I don’t even like my kid that much. I’ll never regret having him and I’ll always love him, but I don’t understand parents who claim to be completely infatuated all the time with a two-year old you can’t reason with and who’s kicking, screaming and lashing out thanks to allergies and a new molar. Why is it ok for me to sometimes not like my husband very much when we’re fighting, but if I say out loud that I don’t like my child when he’s been a little turd for two days, I’m a bad parent?
I read and still own), many cheap teenage/young adult/mass fiction books (Cadfael series, RL Stine, Sweet Valley Twins) when I was younger, along with some more adult/mature books (for school and leisure).
Even though I’m not really interested in research, I’m in a combined residency/PhD. program.
Heck if I know. I don’t like your kid either.
What does that say about me? 
Because your husband is an adult, and when you’re fighting with him, it’s presumably because he did something that, as an adult, he knew he shouldn’t do, and you have the right to expect him to avoid doing, inasmuch as he has adult judgment, skills, and knowledge.
When your child is a “little turd,” it’s presumably because he’s a child, lacking adult impulse control and judgment, and it’s a natural part of being a child.
Also, your husband is thick-skinned and mature enough to hear some variant of “I don’t like you,” without reading dire consequences into it.
Your child may not be.
Well, now, we don’t know if she is actually saying out loud to her child that she doesn’t like him or her. There are plenty of times that I think to myself that one of my children is being unlikable, or I may even tell my husband when the kids are not around OR I may tell my kids that I don’t like their behavior.
Either way, my issue was that I feel closer to one of my kids than the other much of the time.
I’ve thought about it, but I certainly don’t worry about it. I don’t really bad-mouth my coworkers here, nor are my co-workers the type of people who would be on this board. And if someone I knew as a friend found me here, I don’t see how that would be a bad thing. It would probably make for a good story.
But perhaps I’m just naive.
Nope, not at all. I am exactly the same in real life as I am online so if my friends find my posts here they will know it is me long before they see a picture. If my mom or dad show up here and stumble upon a picture of my breasts they will probably be a bit disturbed, but that will teach them to try to hang out in the same places I do whether that is online or in meat space. 
Anytime I meet someone and at some point in the conversation I think to myself, “I should post about this on the Dope” I ask them if the phrase, “Hi Opal” means anything to them. So far no one has understood it so I feel comfortable in the knowledge that they have no idea that this particular message board exists.
I don’t worry about the IRL issue, because there’s nothing I’ve said here that I haven’t said out loud to somebody I know in meat-space. I’m pretty much an open book and if the book contains disturbing imagery and dubious content, so be it! I’ve sent my daughter links to threads I’ve posted in and it wouldn’t surprise me if she ended up joining here–she’s a smart cookie and loves to write just like I do. I certainly make no secret of my Dope habit and my SO surely knows he could read my posts–he’s welcome to and if he gets pissed off at what I say he can tell me–it’s not like there’s any shortage of things we fight about… 
I have an affinity for those terribly trashy rich-bitch Hollywood type books–Olivia Goldsmith type stuff. It’s escapist reading of the first water for someone who mostly reads SF. Isn’t it kind of odd that I consider that “slice of life” stuff to be the escapist fantasy?
I don’t like most kids either–just like I don’t like most people in general. I’ll make funny faces at babies and toddlers but older kids who’re stupid or badly behaved I can’t stand. I’m definitely one of those “it takes a village” types, though, and do not hesitate in the slightest to tell a misbehaving kid to shut up or stop running indoors or to keep their hands off something and if a parent gets pissed at that I have zero problem dealing with the confrontation, either.
Anyone who uses the “word” “cum” I suspect of being really, really, stupid and skeevy. I hate that particular neologism and wish it would retire to the cornfield post-haste. Unfortunately this circumscribes my written erotica sphere considerably. There has to be a better way, dammit!
For that matter, I find it incomprehensible that people actually try to get into chat style sexual interactions with total strangers. Anyone who tries it with me gets short shrift–I mean, really, that person could be anyone or anything so why in hell would I want to get into even a fantasy sexual scenario with them? I’d be infinitely more likely to fuck a guy I met in a bar because at least I’d know what I was dealing with–what he looks like, smells like, how he dances, etc. I always picture anyone in a chat room as a Jabba-the-Hutt style alien and I get squicked out. Plus, the average person is ludicrously inept at written flirting and sexual description–really, really, bad. Bulwer-Lytton bad.
Anybody who tells me proudly that they don’t know how to use a computer or that they don’t read is pretty much relegated to the “subhuman” category in my estimation. I don’t suffer fools well, and fools who are proud of their foolishness I don’t suffer at all. I guess this makes me an elitist snob, but I figure I can live with that.