Yeah, and they’re married, too. 
- :: turns on professional salesperson’s ‘I’m just an average Joe’ charm :: *
I don’t write personal ads. It wouldn’t be right to just put myself here on the market and sell myself to you. But what I can do for you is show you what a wonderful woman I am. For a limited time, you can experience the wonder that is lel for yourself, with our new 30-day trial offer. Act now, supplies are limited!
Offer based on one single female, 23, residing in the Southwestern United States. Offer good while supplies last. Not valid where prohibited by law. Cecil Adams not included.
Where do I find me one of these lel’s? And can I put the lel on finance after the trial is over?
lel is available at your local lel retailer. And yes, lel is now available with zero percent financing. That’s right, try lel before July 31 and get zero percent financing for the next 12 months. You heard it, twelve months. Also, for taking of this special offer, you will receive a free gift, courtesy of your local lel retailer. Supplies are limited. Act now – contact your local lel retailer via email at the bottom of this post before it’s too late!
Eh, why not? Female, 24 (for 3 more months), grad student currently revising my thesis and trying to track down the members of my supervisory committee to set up a date for my defense. Just realised with horror how much weight I’ve put on while writing said thesis, otherwise 5’5", waist-length reddish brown hair, hazel eyes, somewhat of a hippie chick. Probably not as smart or funny as I like to think I am, but then who is? I’m somewhat shy and don’t really enjoy going out to clubs, etc. unless there’s a band I want to see. Most of my money, what little I have, gets spent on books (especially fantasy) and CDs, also enjoy movies although I rarely manage to see them in the theatre. I love playing pool, though I haven’t had a chance to in a while, so I’m probably pretty rusty. Have a love/hate relationship with the outdoors because of my hayfever and the fact that I burn within 15 minutes, but I do enjoy getting to anywhere there’s trees and/or water.
Let’s see, what else? Oh yeah, non-smoker and would very much prefer the same. I’m mostly vegetarian, though I do cheat occasionally and eat seafood, especially if sushi is involved. Social drinker. Actually, to be honest, I’m a cheap drunk, thus disgracing my Scottish and German heritage.
I think that’s about everything. Hopefully I haven’t scared off all the guys in the Vancouver area.
How interesting…
Well, first off, there’s far more about me than any three people could possibly be interested in, already on the 'Net. All I shall say is, Google is your friend. (Don’t forget the quotation marks.)
Relevant details for those uninclined to look: SWM, straight, relatively tall, 190 or so, though that’s a guess as I haven’t owned a scale in a decade. Very hands-on, DIY, competent non-Tim-Taylor type handyman. Gearhead but in a technical interest sense, and not a ‘yee-haw, it’s a tractor pull!’ sense.
Details probably not to be found on the 'Net, unless I have a stalker somewhere: Microwave popcorn afficionado, prefers Orville Reddenbacher “butter” flavor. Voracious reader, occasionally frustrated by lack of free time to partake. Non-TV watcher, can honestly say I’ve never seen a single episode of Survivor, Big Brother or Sex and the City. Will occasionally watch Simpsons if given the chance, but currently don’t own a functional TV. Have previous episodes up to about '00 memorized.
Have upwards of five networked PCs but can’t code or program, and doesn’t own a single DVD or player. Owns a Palm but doesn’t know where it is.
Very occasional published writer of dry technical articles. References available. Speaks of himself in odd tenses at times.
No smoke, has no exes nor kids, doesn’t drink but doesn’t mind drinkers who know their limits.
My god, that’s me to a T. Well, actually, it’s not all useless… 
Actually, I fit pretty well into the rest as well…
So, um… wanna go see Terminator 3?
Is it a blender? I could really use a blender.
I’m more of an antisocial drinker. Yep, just me and a big ol’ bottle of Old Grand Dad…
By the way, could people post their locations if they aren’t in their profiles? I realize that ten thousand miles distance might not stop true love but it we aren’t at the true love stage here, are we? Just the curious and attracted stage, with maybe a touch of intense, perverted, animal lust.
I’m already on practically every personal ad site out there (it’s a party game!), but what the hell? Although looking for dates on a site where I did a few months ago post a truly embarassing TMI thread is maybe part of why I can’t find any quality menfolks.
Heterosexual female, 23
Columbia, SC
Non-smoker, social drinker, heavy sarcasm user
My hobbies include anime, movies, good food, fine wine, the wrong men, reading, travel, classic cars, and needlework. I speak English, do okay in French, read Latin, and am working on the Japanese. I’m a baby librarian, fairly close to getting my MLS. Appropriate subject headings really turn me on.
I’m 5’7, fast-metabolism-thin, reasonably fit. I really am looking for new and interesting people to date or to immediately downgrade to hang-out-with status.
So how you doin Zsofia?
Can someone tell me what exactly a social drinker is? I see this everywhere, and I’m never really sure what it describes. Does that mean that the only time you drink is at a bar with other people? That being with other people who are drinking makes it OK to drink, but it’s not otherwise? I mean, I don’t sit down with a bottle of whisky like dantheman but I do have a beer with dinner sometimes. If I drink with my girlfriend, does that make me a social drinker?
I’m just wondering, because it seems like either people only drink at parties, or they’re afraid to admit they drink other times. I mean, I think there is a gray area between “I drink only at shindigs” and “I’m a raging alcoholic who has a gin IV hooked up so I can make it through the night.”
AND, BTW, if I was single and in SC, I would be all over Zsofia. Well, not “all over”…you know hat I mean…
Ugh. I couldn’t have been more kidding if I tried, Necros.
Me neither.
Good! I’ll drink to that! Who’s up for some slammers, huh? Pass me a goat!
To me, a social drinker is someone who can enjoy a drink, but doesn’t let the desire for the drink control them.
33 y.o. long-winded over-analyzer with both X and Y chromosomes seeks respirating female who can tell me to shut up and pass the Doritos. Alternatively, you can be the one who thinks too much and I’ll tell you to shut up. So long as one of us makes the other one laugh, I don’t really care which is which. That’s really all I’m looking for, although I am open to finding my lifelong soulmate and the mother of my planned 43 children.
I’m a serious Christian who’s been to church maybe five times in the last year, an MA student in Literature at a second-rate university who will probably pursue a PhD in something else and a hopeless romantic who has a hard time getting up the nerve to ask for dates. Disorganized, lazy and a bit too flatulent for my own tastes; empathetic to a fault, a good listener, a droll wit, adaptable and easy to please, kind to puppies and adventurous in a Bilbo Baggins sort of way. I sing often and badly.
My taste runs to Springsteen and Spanish guitar, Coen Brothers and Kevin Smith, Graham Greene and John LeCarre, Pre-Raphaelites to post-impressionists. I’ll try anything once, and get used to it after awhile.
Florida for now, but plan to move somewhere after I graduate next spring, most likely Chicago or Taiwan. I look like the dad from Calvin and Hobbes if he gained 15 pounds and started wearing flannel shirts.
I am officially certified to drill bowling balls by the Brunswick Corporation.
Jeezuz-H-Mother-Lovin’-Keerist! I can see why I had been been with MY lifelong soulmate twelve years by the time I was Furt’s age!
Dude, we have to work on your presentation. Think of this as your resume. I’ll presume, though, that between school and the bowling alley you don’t have a lot of experience with resumes.
First rule: The point of your resume is to make somebody WANT you and you do that by emphasizing your POSITIVE aspects. Neither your future employers nor your future mates wish to know ANYTHING about your flatulence. Let them find out about that when it’s too late.
Second rule: There is no second rule. Keep your farts out of it and you’re ahead of the pack.
I always said I wanted a Match.com for brainiacs, so I guess now I have to post.
26, female, 5’8", of Swedish/German/Irish descent. I have long dark, dark blonde hair with red highlights and green eyes. Size 18. Social drinker on rare occasions. Perpetually rosy-cheeked. I’m a lawyer, a first year litigation associate in a large firm who has a love/hate relationship with her job. The hate part is the long hours, because it impinges too much on my favorite activities, which are…
Reading, writing, cooking, hunting in antique shops for bargains, watching movies and educational TV (think History Channel), yakking with friends about current events, canoeing, walking around the lake, refinishing that old table I bought, playing with my cats.
I have an odd sense of humor. I think almost any subject can has a funny side to it. I like to tease, but it’s all in good fun. I am a somewhat notorious practical joker.
I studied English literature, political science, history, and psychology in college, which means that I’m interested in learning about almost anything. I like to go see sports in person (especially in a small stadium), but watching them on TV puts me to sleep.
I like to hang out with people who are intellectually curious and willing to try new things with me. I need someone who will converse with me about current events and obscure trivia. I like hobbies where I can work with my hands.
I will require time alone. This will have to be OK with you.
Though I am initially somewhat shy, I admit that I am often something of a blabbermouth. However, I’ve never been accused of being a boring blabbermouth.
I am not afraid to embarrass myself in public.
My mother says I’m intimidating. My father says I’m intense. My friends think I am pretty easygoing. I guess you will have to decide for yourself.
Likes: Cats. Used bookstores. Good food. Life in the slow lane. Banter and repartee. People with their own opinions who express them in a friendly way and remain open-minded. Board games. Travel.
Dislikes: Smoking. Snobs. Hanging out in smoky bars. Dancing (two left feet). Playing team sports (klutz).