It’s been awhile, and after the complete routing of the Ravenous Wallflowers (or something similar to that) by Team Pants on Fire, I think about time to play this again. The rules and the game in action can be found here here. Here are the rules as according to Hal Briston:
Teams are named by the first member of the team to score a point for their team.
Teams are decided by the first letter of their username and are divided as follows:
Team 1: A C E G I K M O Q S U W Y Team 2: B D F H J L N P R T V X Z
For this game at least, I’ll act as ref. And here we go!
JimSox5 tosses the ball up to be controlled by. . .
I run around for a while, looking hopelessly unathletic, finally falling upon the ground, gasping for breath, wondering where the hell I am.
At least 200 yards from the nearest goal (of either team) and hopelessly gasping for air, I blindly toss the ball behind me, hoping to hell a teamie is there to cover my assets.
It turns out that the person behind me belongs to Team…
Johnny Bravo leaps into action and grabs the ball from Standup Karmic. Unfortunately, he immediately falls flat on his face and the ball rolls across the court, stopping at whose feet? Why, none other than…
Johnny Bravo’s roll nudges BraheSilver’s shoes. He looks down and recognizes the Doperball. Somewhere, a string quarter changes to a minor key.
“I swore I’d never return to the field. Not after last time…”
Brahe seems to be having some sort of horrific flashback, something that would make for a riveting Movie of The Week but is absolutely no use at all here in the game. As he falls over and curls into the fetal position, he inadvertantly kicks the ball to…
Brahe
kicks the ball which hits
Unclviny
in the head and he cries like a pissed off 2 year old, in his tantrum he smacks the ball and it rolls limply away.
Phelan snatches the loose ball with one hand that Chimpy dropped, and starts heading for the oppisite end,dodging, dipping, and dodging, all while humming the Notre Dame theme. He throws, kicks, or shoots the ball, and it goes off the post, and back to…
Phelan’s shot makes an audible “ping” sound as it ricochets, in a very slow and dramatic way, straight at Standup Karmic.
“I have two options, I believe,” says Karmic to himself. “I could grab that ball and hurl it at the goal-scoring-receptacle - what did they call that…a net? - and be done with it. I’ll be a hero…everyone will love me. I’ll be like that chap, Rudy. Now there’s a name you don’t hear very often - Rudy. I sounds common enough, but I can’t say that I’ve ever known a Rudy. Same goes for ‘Betty’. You wouldn’t think of ‘Betty’ as a rare name. Maybe they’re just older names. The kind that were used back at this time in the 20th century. Names like Mildred and George. You don’t hear ‘George’ very often, though I believe that was once quite common. Oh hey, remember George? I loved that dog. The finest Border Collie a boy could ever have as a pet. I miss George. I miss having a dog, period. Maybe I should get one. They’re just so cute and…and…companionable. Companionable? Hey, what was the name of that girl with the snake. She was a lovely young thing. Her name was…uuuuhhhhhhhh…uuuuhhhhhhhhh…I suppose it doesn’t matter. Oh crap, I’ve got that haircut appointment today at 3. I’ll have to remember to leave work early. Hmm…Friday eh? Thank God the weekend’s finally here. What a week. But today is still a workday. I wonder if that sausage in the 'fridge is still good. That’d make a decent lunch. Oh, and I have to remember to stop and buy toner on the way home. Mmmmmm…craaaaackers. I wonder what a cracker factory looks like. Didn’t Bart and his school go to a cracker factory once? I don’t recall. It sounds familiar. Maybe that was me. Huh! I wonder how they…”
Before the ‘ping’ has even faded from the air, the ball hits Karmic square betwee the eyes, who seems to have been lost in thought and never even saw it coming. With yet another audible ‘ping’, the ball bounces off of Karmic’s Neanderthalic forehead and springs into Team 1’s goal.
The ball makes an audible “ping” sound as it bounces off of Johnny Bravo’s head, and in a very slow and dramatic way, straight at Standup Karmic.
“I have two options, I believe,” says Karmic to himself. “I could grab that ball and hurl it at the goal-scoring-receptacle - what did they call that…a net? - and be done with it. I’ll be a hero…everyone will love me. I’ll be like that chap, Rudy. Now there’s a name you don’t hear very often - Rudy. I sounds common enough, but I can’t say that I’ve ever known a Rudy. Same goes for ‘Betty’. You wouldn’t think of ‘Betty’ as a rare name. Maybe they’re just older names. The kind that were used back at this time in the 20th century. Names like Mildred and George. You don’t hear ‘George’ very often, though I believe that was once quite common. Oh hey, remember George? I loved that dog. The finest Border Collie a boy could ever have as a pet. I miss George. I miss having a dog, period. Maybe I should get one. They’re just so cute and…and…companionable. Companionable? Hey, what was the name of that girl with the snake. She was a lovely young thing. Her name was…uuuuhhhhhhhh…uuuuhhhhhhhhh…I suppose it doesn’t matter. Oh crap, I’ve got that haircut appointment today at 3. I’ll have to remember to leave work early. Hmm…Friday eh? Thank God the weekend’s finally here. What a week. But today is still a workday. I wonder if that sausage in the 'fridge is still good. That’d make a decent lunch. Oh, and I have to remember to stop and buy toner on the way home. Mmmmmm…craaaaackers. I wonder what a cracker factory looks like. Didn’t Bart and his school go to a cracker factory once? I don’t recall. It sounds familiar. Maybe that was me. Huh! I wonder how they…”
Before the ‘ping’ has even faded from the air, the ball hits Karmic square betwee the eyes, who seems to have been lost in thought and never even saw it coming. With yet another audible ‘ping’, the ball bounces off of Karmic’s Neanderthalic forehead and springs into Team 1’s goal.
[/QUOTE]
So, I just re-read the rules. And because I touched the ball twice without there being a score in between, Team 2 loses possession. I’m assuming that my goal will be disqualfied.
I’m going to go now. I may be back. Or I may just watch from the stands.
No, you’re fine, Standup, because the ball changed possession inbetween your touches, and your other posts, I assume, were attempting to correct your typo So, Team 2 draws first blood, 1-0, and the ball goes back to the middle, open season.
Oh, and Standup, you get the incredibly high pressure job of naming your team.
Taking the feed off of the ref, I pull out my portable trebuchet, load it up with the Doperball, and send that sucker flying downfield straight toward…
You know, I’m not unathletic in a “hung out in the chess club room in high school” kinda way. I mean, I blade, I snowboard, I hike. I even do a bit of weight training.
But what you see here is the reason that I was ALWAYS picked last for teams those many years ago in school. I mean, I can’t even play a text-based sport without scoring on my own freakin’ net! Holy crap, eh?
If I still get to name my team, I’m gonna name it, “The Team That’s Stuck With Standup”. If I get to name the other team, they’re gonna be called “Glad Those Bastards Have Standup”.
Thanks for the clarification, JohnnyBravo. I thought it was me.
Hal Briston’s trebuchet shot strikes danceswithcats square in the back of the head, as he has stumbled onto the field to relieve himself after another night of MAD debauchery. Mumbling obscenities, he dodges the dancing badgers while rushing towards the goal line, only to trip over a carelessly discarded bananaphone, passing the ball to…
So, Team 2 draws first blood, 1-0, and the ball goes back to the middle, open season.
