I really don’t understand the warnings on bridges and overpasses
"Caution, may become icy in winter"
Well, duh, it can’t ice up in the summertime can it. Why do they feel they have to add the “in winter” part?
lawnmower - warning: do not lift in the air to use as hedge trimmer
Here’s a little thing I did on another website about stupidity in general that includes the wonders of product labeling.
Hopefully you can get some enjoyment out of it. If not, may you be left unattended in a shopping cart, use a plastic bag as a toy, and eat those little packs of something you find in consumer electronics boxes.
What?
I’m the only one who owns a Dremmel Tool?
I’m not kidding, the directions, repeatedly say “DO NOT USE FOR HOME DENTISTRY”
GOOD GOD!
Home Dentistry, yikes, I don’t even want to think about why that’s in the literature.
Cap’n Yoaz you owe me a keyboard! That was great, but the lines that set it off were:
Great stuff 
Warning! This product contains protons, neutrons and electrons. Manufacturer cannot be held responsible for random quantum fluctuations.
Contents may settle during shipping, earthquake or volcanic activity. Keep out of reach of a thermo-nuclear explosion.
Money refunded if not 100% satisfied.
If the manufacturer is satisfied with your money, it will not be refunded.
Drat, another good idea shot to hell…
Yep, I just knew there had to be some outrageous examples out there. Gotta love the “Don’t drive with sunshade open” and I certainly understand anyone’s Granny returning an artifact that reads about as dangerous as a small nuclear device…
But how’s the curling-iron as a warm, pleasure inducing device a bad idea? Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure it needs some tweaking…but I’m willing to bet there’s a market out there for something like this.
Hmmm…off to get a patent. BBL.
I believe this was on a chainsaw…
Do not attempt to stop with genitals
:eek:
~Kittie
Spouse’s favorite, seen on a microwave meal:
If product is not heated to your liking, continue to heat until product reaches desired temperature.
Good grief, you actually need to TELL people that?!?!?
Actual warning label from some firecrackers I bought:
Light fuse and get away.
Isn’t it a little ridiculous to put a warning label on a product you’re buying specifically because it is dangerous?
While I’m fairly certain we could modify a curling iron to perform safely, the problem is testing it. I’d have my work cut out to find a woman willing to test out the new heated dildo.
“Yeah, it’s, er, safe. Look, there’s a fuse. It won’t melt your pussy.”
Ya know, the first vibrators were steam powered…
I once got a package of vaginal suppositories for a yeast infection… these are hard, waxy things that look like bullets, about the size of my pinky finger.
The warning said “Not for use in the eye”
Which really REALLY made me curious to know what prompted that warning to be added…
I’ve been laughing at this sig for over a year and now you tell me that there’s a level of truth in there?
I’ll fess up. I have no idea how much truth is involved in that. I found that line on a site of quotes as being attributed to a “box for a super-hero costume”. It sounds a little dubious to me.
But if you think about, it works as just a general creed to life. Which is how I read it.
I would LOVE a warning on beer bottles that don’t have twist-off caps.
I always cut my hand on the first bottle of a new brand.
roflol! anyway, there’s one i saw on a bottle of water once:
Caution: Do not add poison :rolleyes:
i mean, gawd, people may be stupid, but not THAT stupid… geez
On a similar note I think I remember being told of a microwave meal with the warning ‘caution: contents will be hot after heating’
Steam-powered dildos, neutering chainsaws and vaginal suppositories that can poke your eye out.
Trend or happenstance?
Yikes :eek: