Expiration dates on condoms gives me false hope

Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)
#21

I hear ya. I’m in a similar situation- its not for a lack of effort, I guess all I could chalk it up to is bad luck. I had a fling on a cruise last summer, but I really wished it was more than just a fling :frowning: Lately I also have the problem ‘of no women in a 10 mile radius of Incubus are single’.

Shit, if there was a slut dorm I could be reduced to frequenting, I would have been there yesterday :stuck_out_tongue: At least you have a choice to agonize over. Lately I have only had one option: Being single, because the way things are right now, I could be living on a planet devoid of women and not be any worse off than I am now :frowning:

#22

There’s hope for you. Just don’t jump the first thing you get a chance to, good things come to those who wait…
:wink:

#23

That’ll teach you to toss out a straight line on this message board. :wink:

#24

I’ve been waiting a long time. To hell with good. I’ll take something with a pulse.

Desperate? why sort of, why do you ask?

#25

Tuxedo? :confused:

I’ll have to google that one.

#26

Heh, tuxedo.

“You say you don’t do casual sex? OK, I’ll rent a tux!”

#27

Actually, I feel the same way. But what exactly would I do? I have no idea what to say or do in the situation of being in a slut dorm. Much as I’d love to go down there and get laid, I have no clue what I’d say/do once I found some random girl’s room. It’s all rumors, anyway, mostly circulated by girls. So, what am I supposed to do, walk around the hall with a handle of Bacardi knocking on doors until I find an attractive and easy-seeming girl? :confused:

#28

Are the “tuxedo” condoms the black ones? Those are kind of nice because no matter how crunk you are you can still tell if something’s wrong because of the white-on-black contrast. I remember sitting there, twisted on psychedelic drugs, staring at the condom after the second time (first day) my first friend-with-benefits (FWB) and I had sex, pondering: “Why is the top of this black condom white?” After a few seconds, I suddenly realized that I was looking at a broken condom, and drove seemingly in autopilot to my friend’s house halfway across town to get some Plan B or somesuch for my FWB. That was surreal.

(We made the decision to have sex before the drugs were ingested, BTW, for those who think me some sort of date-rapist.)

#29

Y’all got my hopes up with that talk of the OP having pictures on the board! I looked for them, but I couldn’t find them.
:smack:

#30

Having sex with a friends-with-benefits while stoned out of your gourd? Man, I wish I had your problems, fetus :wink:

#31

AFAIK the tuxedo condoms are the black ones. Spiffy.

#32

Haha, sorry. For those who were curious, that particular day’s twister was 150 mg of Robitussin (coughgels) each.

#33

Just hang out in the area, make eye contact (for a fraction of a second longer than is ‘polite’), and chat someone up. Jeez… I can’t count the number of times when I was in college, just hanging around the dorms and I ended up chatting up or being chatted up by some girl. Happens kinda outa the blue often.

Oh, and, why would dropping some psychedelic (or making some tea) and then getting it on be anywhere near date rape? As I recall from college, that was a large part of the fun. Hang out with beautiful women, do strange and wonderful drugs, have strange and wonderful times.

Ah well.

#34

UGGGGGGG.
Robotripping… yuck.

#35

That’s what I’ve been doing wrong–no drugs!

That explains everything.

#36

Well, if I remember correctly there were people who didn’t do drugs.
I’m not sure what exactly they did do…
I sure as hell never met them :wink:

#37

iffin it’s Ciclon, stop by my door.
I’m not easy, but I give good foot rubs.

#38

Based on my experience, they play a lot of Scrabble. A game of Scrabble can lead to interesting things, though.

#39

Hrm. Doesn’t sound like a bad idea.

I agree with all this, but I figured some people might take it the wrong way when I say that I was having sex while twisted on drugs, so I included a disclaimer.

Taking coughgels (as opposed to downing cough syrup - ick!) isn’t so bad. Well worth it IMO, although after a while taking all those pills does start to get a little tiresome.

Sure thing! I could go for a good foot rub.

I’m quite good at giving rubs myself, although they generally don’t involve the feet :wink:

Well, I don’t know what kind of school you went to, but I’ve never heard of such weirdos. :wink:

#40

{To the tune of My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean}

My mother sells condoms to sailors
My father pricks them with a pin
My sister performs the abortions
My God, how the money rolls in.

{Trad.}