EZ Squirt, my ass!

The BBQ Pit
1

Damn you, Heinz! Damn you to hell for putting your delicious and oh-so-pretty funky purple ketchup-like product* in this horrible torture device that is the EZ Squirt bottle! The damn thing clogs instantly upon ketchup-like product touching it. Rinsing it out doesn’t work. Blowing it out doesn’t work. Even digging at it with a fork is to no avail.

I curse you, Heinz. I curse you with the knowledge that it is harder for a rich man to enter the kingdom of Heaven than it is to get a drop of ketchup-like product out of your DAMN EZ SQUIRT BOTTLE!

*under federal regulation ketchup is red, so Heinz has to label its purple and green concoctions as a “condiment made with…ketchup”

2

I have no first hand knowledge of the Heinz purple ketchup, but I had to chime in with:

“EZ Squirt, my ass” has to be the best thread title ever. The possiblities are endless.

3

It made me think of that joke:

“Voodoo dick, my ass!”

4

Oh, geeze. For a second, I thought this was a thread about Astroglide. Never mind.

Robin, who really needs sleep.

5

Either that thread title’s really misleading or I’ve been looking at WAY too many free internet porn mpegs.