… 7-Up instead of water, and it didn’t work out well.
I went to the library, but ended up …
… in jail for lewd acts.
While in jail…
, it is generally advisable not to brag about the many profitable years you spent as a police informant.
The SDMB Postcard Exchange this summer _____________
^^^^^was quite the experience.
The last time I wrote a real pen and paper letter it was___________.
A ransom note/communist manifesto.
When I close my eyes I can…
…more easily walk into walls…with a decent excuse.
When I cover my ears…
…the voices telling me to kill grow louder.
Screaming to make them stop does…
… nothing but annoy the cat.
The last time I had a drink at a bar …
…I wound up in jail for lewd acts.
After my second offense…
I realized i needed to figure out better ways to conceal my drinking and driving.
Is that a banana in your pocket or are you…
… hugely endowed?
Is that a nose on your face or …
are you a bird disguised as a human?
When I eat waffles…
I like to make sure each indent has its share of butter and syrup.
When the electricity goes out…
… I stumble around in the dark, trying to find a flashlight.
While I was at the supermarket yesterday …
…the limes and the coconuts were conspiring to overthrow the produce section.
One time, at band camp, …
…someone dropped movie references that completely went by me.
If at first you don’t succeed…
…then you suck at everything, you loser!
Asking randos on the internet has…
Led to an incurable STD, losing my home, my marriage and my car.
Nothing is better than…
^^^going to jail for a lewd act.
When I was on the witness stand__________.
…I threaten to kill the prosecutor, the jury, the bailiff, and the judge.
While in jail for contempt…