- Whipped cream
- Oh, God!
- Dildo
- Feather
- Nookie
- One night stand
- Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders
- Mom
- Spanking
- Anal
Bonus: Jaw cramp
You guys (and girls) are killing me!! I’m starting to wish I woulda just set the scoring based on funniest answers. Bubster keeps coming over and asking me what’s wrong, because I’m laughing and crying like loony.
I honestly don’t care how hard the scoring proccess will be; it’s sooooo worth it!
- oysters
2.Ohhhhhhhhhuurrrrrrrgh! - anal beads
- females
- Nooky
6.Sex with a postman. - that one with a room full of horny Kylies.
- a parent
9.nipple sucking - Incest
B. A sprained wrist.
1. Name a food associated with sex. Mangoes.
2. Give a phrase likely to be shouted during orgasm. “F*** me!”
3. Name an item that would be emabarassing to purchase at a sex store. A pony tail butt plug.
4. What is one “everyday” object that causes arousal? High heels.
5. Give a euphimism for sex. Bumpin’ uglies.
6. What fantasy is MOST likely to actually happen? Woman wears naughty cheerleader outfit.
7. Flip side: What fantasy is LEAST likely to actually happen? Hot lesbians decide to take random schlub home with them.
8. Name a person who is likely to walk into the room during intercourse. Your MOM.
9. List one sexual NON-penetrative act. Frottage.
10. Give a “taboo” sexual act. Pegging.
BONUS: Name an injury sustained during a sexual act. Penile fracture.
-
Name a food associated with sex.
Chocolate sauce -
Give a phrase likely to be shouted during orgasm.
Fuck fuck fuck -
Name an item that would be embarassing to purchase at a sex store.
Anything ‘jokey’ e.g. penis pasta -
What is one “everyday” object that causes arousal?
Washing machine -
Give a euphemism for sex.
Doin’ it -
What fantasy is MOST likely to actually happen?
Bondage -
Flip side: What fantasy is LEAST likely to actually happen?
Female celebrity/male fan hook-up -
Name a person who is likely to walk into the room during intercourse.
Houseguest (if I can stretch it a little, family pet) -
List one sexual NON-penetrative act.
Heavy petting -
Give a “taboo” sexual act.
Felching
BONUS: Name an injury sustained during a sexual act.
Sprained penis
- Chocolate
- Oh god!
- Vibrator/dildo
- shoe
- horizontal bop
- sex in public place
- sex with sisters
- toddler son or daughter
- blow job
- anal
BONUS: penis break
- Oysters
- I love you
- Dildo
- Banana
- Sleeping with
- Sex with stranger
- three way
- child
- hand job
- anal
bonus: broken penis
- Whipped cream
- OMG
- Small condom
- Depends on the day - I’ll take no points, Alex
- Booty (as in “Booty call”)
- Quicky in public
- Orgasm at dinner table
- Kid
- Massage
- Sex with animal
BONUS: Cramp
- cherries
- oh god
- Anal intruder 20000
- my penis
- boinking
- sex with spouse
- sex with someone other than my spouse.
- kid
- cunnilingus
- anal
bonus. rug burn
- Banana
- Oh God
- Anal Lube
- Alcohol
- Getting Lucky
- Sex on the Beach
- Sex on an Airplane
- Kids
- Hand Job
- Sex with animals
Bonus: Torn labia
- Strawberries…
- Oh my god!
- Gerbil remover
- Bicycle seat
- Horizontal Mambo
- sex on the beach
- Me being bombarded by a bus load of bisexual female cheerleaders
- Parents (for us younger dopers) Kids (for them older dopers)
- Oral sex…
- Peeing on some one.
BONUS: banging your forehead on the wall. falling in the shower…
this is going to be quite the spread out and fun gauntlet of answers
-
Oysters
-
“Yes!”
-
Penis-enlarging device
-
Men in three-piece suits
-
Doin’ it
-
Spontaneous sex in unlikely place
-
Sex with my film-star crush
-
Child
-
Masturbation
-
Anal sex
BONUS: Nose broken on pubic bone -
ewwwww
-
No, really! But I seldom see this anymore around here.
-
Anthony Hopkins.
-
Taboo to some. I like it.
BONUS: I bloodied a partner’s nose once, but it wasn’t actually broken. I’m all “what’d you stop for! I was there.” And he’s groaning out “I thig you broge my dose.”
Gaaahhh! I don’t wanna know.
I do. How in the fuck do you accomplish something like that?!
(Perhaps tell in a spoiler tag, for the squeamish?)
- Chocolate
- Yes! Yes! Oh God, Yes!
- Penis pump
- Stockings
- Boinking
- Three way
- Three way involving Brad Pitt and Matt Damon
- Not Brad Pitt or Matt Damon
- Mastubation
- Beastiality
BONUS: Broken heart?
- Cherry
- “Oh, God, I’m coming”
- Strap-on
- Panties
- Doing the nasty
- Threesome
- Necrophilia
- Child
- Fellatio
- Analingus
BONUS: Bruised/chafed erogenous zones.
1. Name a food associated with sex.
cantelope
2. Give a phrase likely to be shouted during orgasm.
“Wrong hole, you stupid bastard!!!”
3. Name an item that would be emabarassing to purchase at a sex store.
car battery
4. What is one “everyday” object that causes arousal?
soup ladle (apparently)
5. Give a euphimism for sex.
“practising for procreation”
6. What fantasy is MOST likely to actually happen?
someone will have sex with someone else
7. Flip side: What fantasy is LEAST likely to actually happen?
I will be involved
8. Name a person who is likely to walk into the room during intercourse.
the homeowner
9. List one sexual NON-penetrative act.
the crying at the end
10. Give a “taboo” sexual act.
selling your sister to the donkey show guy
BONUS: Name an injury sustained during a sexual act.
hurt back from when the ceiling hook breaks
Freekalette, the laughs I’ve had going through these responses, makes me feel that we’d be selfish not to share such joyous abandonment, and so I’m going to ask if you’d mind me taking your feud on tour, or at least try it out on another less-civilised site. Would you mind?
You can have it, ivan. But if/when you get a reality show deal, I want 2% of the cut, mmkay? 
Thanks, freekalette. I’m not going to impose any rules on the feud, as they’ll think it’s like homework, and rebel. But if I get any noteworthy responses, I promise I’ll share them, if you want?