Learn to fucking park, retard. Problem solved.
Haha, no shit. I like the way he says “2 feet, 3 tops” as if that’s some negligible amount. How the hell do you even get that far over into another space on accident? Were you parking blindfolded? “Oh, I was only taking up two parking spaces. Three tops. Hey, I was on the far end of the parking lot, so what’s the big deal?”
When my baby sister turned 16, she began driving my mom’s F-150. She did well on her driving test, of course, but she still had very little driving experience. Yet, when she took her to truck to Wal-Mart, she knew how to park it like a civilized person between the lines. I guess judging from the OP, she was some sort of prodigy child!
Seriously, OP. You satisfy just about every negative stereotype about pickup drivers there is. Bad driving? Self-important? Misogynist? Aggressive to the point of roid rage? Check, check, check, and a big ol’ check.
The only incongruity in your story is that you were at Target instead of WalMart.
Metallica, when they still sucked.
You think the OP may be like these people?:
So you agree that puttinig a assholish “parking ticket” on his windshield was fine, because he had the gall to park over the line.
Every time I hear the excuse that someone went to the back of the lot to park like this, I roll my eyes a little. While that might have been true this time, I have little doubt that it isn’t true much of the time. I’ve little doubt that parking like that is a common practice, whether it is over the line into the spot in front, or straddling the lines, or parking in a compact only spot (really, bastard, your Chevy Tahoe looks like a fucking compact to you?) or spending just a couple of minutes in the disabled spot, because after all no one was there anyway and I just need a pack of smokes…
I could be wrong. The OP could be a parking angel at all other times. But I doubt it. Especially with the utterly ridiculous attitude shown towards anyone who dares to even look at his wunder-truck.
It’s a wonder the OP hasn’t yet challenged everyone in this thread to a fight.
If you willfully joined a riot, and some asshole broke a bottle over your head and you complained about it and I replied, “Don’t get involved in riots. Problem solved.”, would your natural conclusion be that I thought it was okay to break bottles over heads?
It wouldn’t surprise me in the least.
I don’t really see what was so bad about the fake ticket. It was snarky, yeah, but it is it any worse than yelling, “Learn how to park!” at some guy who can’t park?
Leaving a note under the windshield wiper is the standard way to communicate with the owner of a parked car. What would be better? Wait for the OP to return, and tell him in person? Get his plate number, track down his home address and mail him a letter?
If the OP is telling the truth that there were plenty of better spaces than the second one he occupied, then it was ticky-tack but hardly assholish. The OP paraphrased the note so I won’t judge the actual contents. Labeling it a “Parking Ticket” is indeed lame; asking the OP to only take one space next time is just fine, though. And I agree that this is probably not the first time the OP has done this, just the first time he’s been called on it.
That’s why I love America, it’s wide vast parking plains, where yes oversized vehicles have been known to park outside the lines. 
Many people with larger vehicles have no fucking clue what size they are. Or maybe he was just drunk. Or punching a baby at the time. I hear baby-punching can be really distracting while driving.
Yes.
What, you want me to say that the other person should have waited in the parking lot for him to come back out? They didn’t damage his car in any way: they left a message because they had no other reasonable way to contact him to inform him that he was, as I have already observed, a retard who can’t fucking park.
It’s been clinically proven that people who drive F150s are functionally retarded, too. Clinically. Though admittedly there is a mitigating factor when it’s “for work”; those people only drool when they talk rather than speak gibberish.
Yes of course there’s a better way than leaving a “parking ticket”, leave a less assholish note. That was the point, which I think we agree on. One dick move does not excuse another dick move.
Now as for the tone of the OP, well I don’t know, I mean a vent is a vent, but the OPer doesn’t really shine in the post, that’s for sure.
Fake tickets are “pranky” and have an element of humor to them. A hand written note expressing dissatisfaction of his parking job would come off as more ass-holish.
I’m fairly certain I didn’t leave the note on your truck, because I don’t have any pre-printed ones and I don’t leave anon notes. I am so down with the idea of telling you that you are a shitty parker. In your case, I may have given you a pass if you were actually as far from everyone as you say; and I’m fine with people who park way far away if the rig were obviously too large for a regular spot.
I have left notes myself, with my name and contact info should the jerk need further explanation about what is appropriate behavior in a parking lot. Cuz I’m assertive like that. Indeed I may get my ass kicked one day; I know the risks given I live in an area full of gang-bangers, rednecks, and general assholes.
And you know the people who leave notes around the office telling you to pick up after yourself? That’s me, too; you know it’s me because my name is on it with an invite to explain why you are so clueless.
ETA:
So I can’t win, huh? Pre-printed notes suck, anon notes suck, hand-written notes suck? I know I’m not the parking police, but obviously some people just need to be told; or maybe I just need to be telling them. 
Did I say you couldn’t win? I said one is more ass-holish than another. Or did you mean you can’t win because different people have different opinions? Boo-hoo.