Said with a Scottish accent:“Ach, if ya look again it grew some more.”
“I dunnae knae where ya been laddie, but yae won first prize!”
You want brilliance BEFORE I’ve had my coffee!!!
No, it says “Welcome to Jamaica, Mon, and have a nice day!”
“Voodoo vibrator, my ass!”
“Boyfoot bear with teaks of Chan”
“I don’t know, but his face rings a bell” followed by “I don’t know, but he’s a dead ringer for his brother!”
“Why not? I’m a fun-gi”
“Poh-taaaaaa-tohhh!”
Sucks to your assmar.
Bring me a watermelon and a jar of mayonaise.
“Pardon me while I have a strange interlude.”-Marx
That’s not a joke, it’s foreplay.
Change Your Password, Please and don’t use HTML, as it has been disabled
You’re Thor??? I can hardly thit down!!
Elephino (Hell if I know!)
-Frankie
I’m a wholesale dealin papa, but I retail on the side.-Brownie McGhee
“Is it…moosecock?”
“But you fuck just one goat…”
“Lickalotapuss”
One is a group of cunning runts…
“It’s going to be a long night. The McMurphy brothers are drunk again.”
“No, it’s not you, it’s the guy next to you dipping his chips in your neck.”
“Keep the tip.”
“You’re scared? I’m the one who has to walk back alone.”
Getting the blood out of the clown suit.
“You ain’t so tough, Batman!”
“You ain’t gonna like Sundays then, either.”
“His father’s dick tastes funny.” (Grossest joke I ever heard)
“Yesterday we were recruiting. Today, you’re staff.”
“Where are YOU gonna get a lawyer?”
My fate keeps getting in the way of my destiny.
All of the good ones are taken already. Ah, here goes:
Orange you glad I didn’t say banana again?
She decided to wash up on shore.
…but when you get blue, and you’ve lost all your dreams, there’s nothing like a campfire and a can of beans!
You sneak up behind him and kick him in the icehole.
… and that’s the story of how the angel got on the tree.
Okay:
Sure! Just don’t slap me as hard as you did the monkey!
I’m a frayed knot!
How do you think I knocked on the door?
No, but the guy before you was!
Nothing much, just sitting around watching p*rnos and eating cheetos.
“Yeah, but this one’s eating my popcorn!”
One shoots and shoots and never hits.
One shucks between fits.
On clucks defiance.
D’OH! ONE! ONE clucks!
…those aren’t bouys!!!
Tax? I thought you just rolled them on!
You stupid drunk! You’re sitting on a mop bucket!
But my husband made his own lunch.