Get away from me, you predatory shirt-lifter!

False advertising, goboy. We thought we were gonna get a shocking tale of shirt-lifting predation that would gratify our prurient curiosity while kindling our sympathetic outrage. Instead, we find a rather ordinary story of one clueless person’s tasteless—but hardly unprecedented or even legally actionable—attempt at a pickup. Yup, we agree that it’s annoying to be crudely hit on, especially by people you don’t find attractive, and invading someone’s personal space in order to hit on them is very bad manners and scary bad manners too. But the next time you start a thread whose title hints at indecent indignities publicly inflicted on a handsome young gay guy, deliver the goods, 'mkay? :wink:

(By the way, it is proper etiquette for somebody so accosted to move coldly away from the invader and refuse to speak to him/her at all. Even in response to the subsequent “pseudo-legitimate” question about the computer mags. He has put himself outside the pale of polite intercourse (er, unfortunate word, but you know what I mean) by his rudeness, and you may quite properly treat him as though he doesn’t exist. I find this to be a lot more effective than any verbal brushoff, which gives him at least the small success of having made you acknowledge his presence and respond to his approach.)

Oh, come on. I read Men’s Health. I’m a straight guy. Just because they have tons of pictures of shirtless guys. . .
Uh. . .
I mean, just because they so often feature pictures of sweaty men working out. . . and men being with other men. . .I mean. . .
Oh damn. . .

Actually, Men’s Health is pretty hetero-oriented with lots of articles on getting girls, how married guys can maintain
a full sex life with their wives, and so on. It’s main demographic seems to me to be straight guys over thirty with comfortable incomes, judging by the ads.

Now, mags like Men’s Workout and Men’s Fitness are basically spank material for men in the closet, men living in small towns where gay porn is unavailable, or for guys who are bi or fooling themselves that they are. They have semi-nude pictorials of muscular young men, and photo spreads of two guys working out together in wildly unrealistic attitudes. I mean, two guys don’t work out by pulling on a towel together. Plus, the ads in the back are full of gay-oriented material, photosets of bodybuilders, and so on.

Aargh! Its, NOT it’s. Memo to self-use preview option BEFORE posting.

Hey goboy. I understand your pain. I think that anyone who makes light of your plight doesn’t know who intesley creepy it is to be hit on by a horny gay man when you don’t want to be. For some reason there is a large subset that seems to specialize in catchingg you unawares at the most inapropriate momment. Those one’s where you really want to scream “GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME” really really loud.

It’s not being hit on by a horny gay man, it’s the unwelcome familiarity, the intrusion into one’s space, that so creeps me out. It’s the idea of being treated like an object instead of a person.

Like Wring pointed out, women have to put up with this crap from the straight male population daily.

Correction, it tries to be pretty hetero-oriented. :smiley:

Amen, Hastur!

I get sick of women bitching about this too and I AM A WOMAN!

I have a married co-worker who rolls her eyes at compliments from men (see the Hypocritical Bitch thread) and says that they disgust her. These are harmless, public comments like, “Shirley, you look very nice today!”

She’s a very attractive woman who is vain as Hell and is one of those women who bitches that they’re fat when they’re about as fat as a fucking toothpick. I guaranDAMNtee you that if the compliments stopped, she would miss them.

If someone has taken the time to sincerely compliment you, SAY FUCKING THANK YOU!

I’m with goboy; this stuff gives me the squirmy creeps. I don’t think I’d like it any better if I were gay, or if it were women doing it. In fact, on rare occasion I’ve had women attempt to uh…flirt? …with me with a really sewerish wink-wink/nudge-nudge routine that made me want to throw up. And this is from a guy who really wishes women in general were a lot more forward and aggressive in expressing their sexual interests! Nice is sweet, naughty can be delightful, but dirty is usually revolting and smarmy is barfologically as far from sexy as bedsore fermenting nausea stringy-ooze necrotic dead-animal-tummyguts can get. And after putting you in that frame of feeling they go nudge-nudge/wink-wink and say “oh I know you like it too”.

The issue here is goboy’s personal space was invaded, and it was an unwelcome comment at the wrong time and place, not that the guy was unattractive.

Anyway, i hate when strangers invade my personal space. This is why I hate going shopping on busy shopping days (like weekends). Far too many people stand far too close and I hate that. I dont even like when friends get too close to talk to me (normal conversations I mean). I also dislike people who, when i’m talking to them start getting closer. Usually i start to back up.

Thanks, Doobieous, that’s exactly the point i was trying to make. Hastur and Canthearya were completely off basee in their posts dissing my response. I’m no snob, and if head come up to me in Omega, JR’s, or the Eagle, I would certainly have talked to him. But coming up that close to me, invading my space and acting creepy really turned me off.

Or do you two like having guys get behind you justlikethis and making unsettling sexual overtures?

Goboy, I’m not going to call you on this. You were there and I wasn’t, so I have no idea what the situation was like. But reading your OP, I see six seperate references to the man’s age and/or unattractiveness and a single mention that he was standing next to you “likethis”. From this, I misunderstood what it was that gave you offense.

The guy was definitely unattractive, but if head talked me to in a nice way, I would haveanswered. Heck I did answer his question about computer magazines. The guy was creepy, period.
Geez, now I know how women must feel when they report this. Next thing I know, you’ll be saying I was asking for it.

Oh come on goboy, we all know that you were only encouraging his affections. If you bothered to not perform bodily hygene, this man would not have gone after you. You were asking for it.

goboy, I hope when I hit on you you don’t take offense at my invasion of your personal space… :wink:

I totally understand you. It sounds like you’re being a body snob, but there are differences in the way a creep guy (good-looking or not) and a nice guy can say the simple phrase, “So, you work out, huh?” One gets you a smile, the other gets you a drink in the face.

I get hit on - a lot - by older men. Some are nice about it, some are intentionally lascivious. I always remind myself that it’s a compliment, but at the same time I have every right to acknowledge the compliment, acknowledge it and turn it down, or be rude to them if they are rude to me. However, I do admit I don’t like to be rude, and will only be so if pushed to my limit, which is pretty far.

For example, I was out two-stepping once, went to the bar and was waiting to get my customary orange juice, when an older man (to whom I was not attracted) came up and said, “Wow, you really dance well, and you look exhausted. Can I buy you a drink?” Certainly I took it as a compliment, let him buy me a drink, chatted for a brief moment, but another line dance came up that I wanted to do, so I thanked him and went to dance for a while more. I kind of got the impression he could be creepy, but he initially wasn’t, so I didn’t want to pre-judge. Well, then I notice he’s staring at me from off the dance floor. About an hour later he comes over to me, OJ in hand, and says, “You look like you could use another one.” Well, I said thank you, took a sip, and set it down (never drink something you didn’t see poured yourself) and walked away. Now I was officially being creeped. When he came at me with a third drink, I politely declined and said, “I don’t think my boyfriend would appreciate me taking drinks from strangers.” I then went right over to my gorgeous friend Brad, put my arm around his shoulder, and whispered in his ear, “Play boyfriend.” He immediately turned to me, kissed me on the mouth, and we went on the dance floor and did a slow sexy song together. My would-be suitor got the hint.

Creepy’s creepy, though - only you can decide what is and isn’t appropriate for you.

But, hey - at least he noticed your buffness. :wink:

Esprix

Hey, my dad reads Men’s Health and he’s not gay. At least, I HOPE he’s not gay since, he and Mommy will celebrating their Silver Anniversary this October…:slight_smile: (25 years and the man is totally whipped after living in a house of all FEMALES -even the dog and the cats).

He reads it for the food and exercise stuff.
But then, my dad never did like porn. He thinks it’s gross.

Ugh…I hate it when people get REALLY close to me…it’s like get the fuck away from me!
And don’t fucking touch me!

Tell me, if that guy had hit on a young GIRL, would it have been appropriate?
But because he’s gay it’s okay?
NOT!

goboy, if anyone guy ever did that to me, he’d get it in the nads, seriously.

And, where can I find Men’s Fitness…(semi-nude male models, you say?..:wink:

He asked you an innocuous question and looked at you. Big fucking deal. This is striking me as internalized homophobia which percieves such an act as being obvious and potentially outting you in public when it wasn’t.

You were rude to him, and thus either from fear or bad manners, showed yourself to be a less than decent person.

I am a fat fellow. Does this make me unatractive to most people? Probably. Should this get me ridculed? Nope.

Well, did he say it in a nonchalant sort of way, or more like the “hey little, girl, do you want some candy” sort of way?