So sorry, there I go showing off my erudition over obscure salad leaves and little-known songs by fringe performers. :smack:
Plus it’s more commonly called arugula in the US.
“Arugula. It’s a ve-ge-ta-ble”. - Steve Martin, My Blue Heaven
If I hear someone say “arugula”, I have to blurt out “aaahROOOOOgula!”…it sounds like an old-timey car horn.
I always hear Martha Stewart barking it.
Knock-knock.
Who’s there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
One of my favorite movie lines. Really.
“Do you know how to save a bigot from drowning?”
“No.”
“Good!”
I told that to someone once and he asked, “What’s a bigot?” :rolleyes:
I’ve wondered whether those are the only three words Tommy Chong knows.
How many cops does it take to push a scumbag down the stairs?
None. He tripped and fell.
Superman: All right, funny man, I have one for you. Knock-knock.
His mark: <bored, eyes rolled> Who’s there?
Superman: Kltpzyxm!
His mark: kltpzyxM wh-- Ohhh! Oh, shhh-
Oh, I’m sorry. No more non-American references in jokes then, it might make someone have to spend five seconds Googling when they would rather not. :rolleyes:
Skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a beer and a mop.
Here’s one I just made up for my 5 year old…
Q. What do French frogs eat?
A. French flies.
^ The internet Ninja’d you. 
Last week, someone stole my identity.
Today, they showed up at my door, begging me to take it back.
I did Google “lollo rosso” [an unfamiliar term to me; I am familiar with arugula] and it did only take about five seconds, but it didn’t help me understand the “joke.” Sorry.
A [ETHNIC #1], a [ETHNIC #2], and an [ETHNIC #3] jump off the Empire State Building at the same time. Which one hits the ground first?
Who cares?!?
The next day, a [ETHNIC #1], a [ETHNIC #2], a [ETHNIC #3] jump off the Empire State Building.
Which one hits the ground first?
The [ETHNIC #3]. The [ETHNIC #1] has to stop and ask directions, and the [ETHNIC #2] stops to spray-paint on the walls.
What did the Police artist draw when the woman described her assailant as “Blond, blue-eyed, and six feet tall”?
A [ETHNIC].
What did she say when she saw the picture?
“THAT’S HIM!!!” :eek:
When a suspect in a rape case was arrested, the woman victim was presented with a lineup.
The suspect, a [ETHNIC], said, “Yep…that’s her!”
Why was Bert doing the pigeon?
Because Ernie said,“Not tonight hun I have a headache.”