The good news is that this is the edition that contains swimsuit photos of The Virgin Mary.
The bad news is that Mary hadn’t shaved her armpits for the photoshoot.
The good news is her arms aren’t raised above her head, so you can’t tell.
The bad news is the twosome pictures of her with Mary Magdalene are pretty blurry.
Yeah that was to bad.
However, the good news is that the boring Deuteronomy section has been replaced with a backpackers guide to Sodom and Gomorrah.
The bad news is that the current weather prediction is for fire and brimstone, with no chance of showers.
The worse news is that they weren’t blurry before twickster got his grubby hands on em.
The good news it the pages are laminared.
The bad news is we don’t know what the consequences of laminaration are, but it doesn’t sound good.
The good news is that pop is dead.
The bad news is that mum spent the insurance money on Bacardi
The good news is they managed to surgically remove the encrusted red Dwarf T-shirt you have been wearing for the last 3 years.
The bad news is that it was covering up the “Cool as Ice” promo t-shirt you have been wearing for the last 10.
The good news is your girlfriend LOVES Vanilla Ice.
The bad news is, the doctor has voved to kill all Vanilla Ice fans.
The good news is, you have inherited a house in the Hamptons…
The bad news is it’s between Billy Joel (drunk driver) and Martha Stewart (need we say more?)
The good news is that the estate is so big it takes 15 minutes to get down the driveway…
The bad news is it’s made up of the kind of terrain Bin Laden likes to hide in.
The good news is that Bin Laden will keep trespassers off your lawn
The bad news is that the US army has gotten wind of Bin Ladens new hideout and bombs the entire city back to the stone age.
The good news is this thread just got to it’s sixth page.
The bad news is you were wrong. This is the seventh page.
The good news is New Jersey was recently voted the Best Place of All Time to live in.
The bad news is, the people there can’t count. 
The good news is, spelling is more important.
The bad news is, you’re a terrible speller.
The good news is, you make enough money to hire an under-paid linguist to spell for you full time.
The bad news is he thinks he’s a dog and is constantly humping your leg.
The good news is you always wanted a pet.
The bad news is you were thinking of something more along the line of Sea Monkeys.
The good news is he can do Sea Monkey impressions as well. He’s got a little furry SCUBA suit and everything. Awww…
The bad news is that he isn’t an authorized SCUBA diver and is arrested on Attempt to Submerge and Possession of Illegal Swimming Apparatus.
The good news is the police feel sorry that you’re losing your pet and all, so they give you a real sea monkey.
The bad news is that he eats too many sea bananas and keeps flinging his sea feces at you.
The good news is that you’ve taught him some neat new tricks.
The bad news is that he, like the linguist, enjoys humping your leg.
The good news, you purchase a leg decoy and he doesn’t know the difference.
The bad news is, he gives your leg the benefit of the doubt.
The good news is, you have plank with a nail in the end.