The bad news is, their results will be as reliable as other committees he’s been inolved with.
[sub]I’m still kicking myself for not telling him what I thought of his behavior in the Clarence Thomas hearings when I saw him in the neighborhood drugstore a few years ago.[/sub]
The good news is, the soundtrack will be by the Dead Kennedys.
The bad news is, the money you make will be collected by Chocolate Cake, with interest.
The goods news is, you invested in Dead Kennedys albums, and will make a fortune on eBay.
The bad news is, all your buyers end up retracting their bids when they get a load of Chocolate Cake.
The good news is, your approval rating is unaffected.
The bad news is, your approval rating is near zilch.
The good news is, your disapproval rating is also near zilch…
The bad news is, we’ve hit a dead end with this scenario.
The good news is, your pet iguana does a trick so great you’re going to be on Letterman this week.
The bad news is, Dave made a condition that you would kill Jay Leno with a herring before he’d show the trick on the air.
The good news is, under California state law, killing a talk show host is justified in the homicide law…
The bad news is, Jay Leno teams up with Jerry Springer, forming the 100ft tall Mecha-Springer.
The good news is, Bush adds Mecha-Springer to the axis of evil.
The bad news is, you can’t harm it by order of the French Government…
(The good news is,)…which will soon topple after the Germans take Paris…
The bad news is the year is 1939.
The good news is you have blue eyes and blonde hair.
The bad news is, you will spend the rest of your days hiding in the mountains from something called ‘Nuremberg.’
The good news is, you have a clever disguise.
The bad news is, it’s of Rudolph Hess.
The good news is, the fuhrer likes you.
The bad news is, he enlists you was a stunt double.
The good news is, the end of the war is in sight!
The bad news is, of course, that your side lost.
The good news is, you’re fairly sure you can re-conquer France by yourself and nobody will care.
The bad news is…Mike Tyson just moved to France
The good news is…As despotic overlord of France, you had his hands cut off.
The bad news is, that you would be french.
The good news is, you have finally learned to cook wome really good french food.
The bad news is, since you had Mike Tyson’s hands cut off, you have to spoon feed him all that French food.
The good news is, you don’t have to bathe him.
The bad news is that, unbathed, Mike Tyson gets a bit pungent.
The good news is that none of the French people notice.
The bad news is the French people don’t notice because they smell worse.
The good news is yor wife is on the phone.
The bad news is the French people don’t notice because they smell worse.
The good news is your wife is on the phone.
The bad news is she’s calling from Las Vegas
The good news is you still have all your credit cards.