Haiku Madness Part Deux

Wow, Madame, wow,
Pepperwinkle Christmases
Succeed 'cause of you.

Succeed ‘cause of you
But I fail ‘cause of you, too
You’re good news/bad news

You’re good news/bad news
You are quite the paradox
You’re more than one dock

You’re more than one dock
You’re an entire pier, the whole
Harbor of my heart

Harbor of My Heart:
Lesser-known Jimmy Buffett
drunken sailor song.

Drunken sailor song
fits so well at New Year’s, but
no drunken driver!

No drunken driver
Will get up my street, tonight;
I haz bulldozer!

I haz bulldozer
And a backhoe and dump truck
Demolition man

Demolition Man:
Sandra Bullock was real cute,
Wesley Snipes wasn’t.

Wesley Snipes wasn’t
Bad in the Blade movies, but
He was real badass.

He was real badass
Or, as they say in France, a
méchant derrière

méchant derrière
means “nasty behind”; those French
have a way with words

Have a way with words -
Without words there is no way -
Yes, it is the way.

Yes, it is the way.
In the beginning was the word.
Haikus came later.

Haikus came later
Poetry chronology
Limericks were first

Limericks were first
Shown as aesthetic sagas,
Quickly went raunchy.

Quickly went raunchy
I asked the astronomer
About Uranus