I like fun too much
And I hate grief and sorrow
Am I abnormal?
Am I abnormal?
Don’t look like Marty Feldman;
quite fortunate, no?
quite fortunate, no?
I have a dog and a cat
the dog eats cat poops
The dog eats cat poops
And subsequently vomits.
The cat eats the puke.
The cat eats the puke
Then the puke is recycled
So puke is thus green
The puke is thus green
Cause I ate asparagus
And my pee smells weird.
And my pee smells weird!
As if nasty-smelling poop
wasn’t bad enough.
And my pee smells weird
My toenails are falling off
Should I see a doc?
D’oh!
Wasn’t bad enough
That my nails were falling off
I’m growing a tail!
I’m growing a tail!
and thereby hangs, well, a tale
won’t bore you with it
Won’t bore you with it,
But I have an anecdote
About Tom Poston.
About Tom Poston
Larry, Darryl and Darryl
Gossip endlessly
Gossip endlessly,
And you get your own talk show
Like Wendy Williams.
Like Wendy Williams,
My giant wig just collapsed
Need the Jaws of Life
Need the Jaws of Life
Bring 'em to the fitting room!
These jeans are too tight.
These jeans are too tight
I love all Christmas cookies
icing and sprinkles
icing and sprinkles
they are my two porn co-stars
guess what Sprinkles does
Guess what Sprinkles does?
She pees all over the couch
After drinking tea
After drinking tea,
Churchill told a Boer War yarn
And lit a cigar
And lit a cigar
That Bill Clinton gave to him.
And it smelt like smelt.
And it smelt like smelt
or so I’m told it smelt, for
I’ve never smelt smelt.