Mess up this order
and I’ll mess up your face. I’m
a hardcore boozer.
A hardcore boozer
might threaten to mess your face
But he’ll just pass out
But he’ll just pass out
Until he wakes up and asks,
“Where is my whiskey?”
Where is my whiskey?
wait, that’s a silly question
where is *your *whiskey?
Where is your whiskey?
I scuff my feet and mumble:
“I drank all of it.”
“I drank all of it”
Said Bob in the beer vat, then
He peed out the fire
He peed out the fire
Though he claimed he didn’t start it.
Billy Joel stopped it.
Billy Joel stopped it
after assuring us that
we didn’t do it
we didn’t do it
nobody saw us do it
can’t prove anything
can’t prove anything
just 'cause my hands are ink-stained
wait. maybe you can.
Wait. Maybe you can.
I’ll let you prove yourself – just
Work a week for free.
Work a week for free
since you can’t pay for your meal
expensive restaurant
expensive restaurant.
Coq au vin et pommes frites, or
McNuggets & Fries!
McNuggets & fries?
or piggies in a blanket?
at my chic wedding!
At my chic wedding,
there’ll be lobster and champaign.
You’re not invited!
You’re not invited!
Well, if you can’t spell “champagne”
I don’t want to come.
I don’t want to come
To a place that would have me
It’s complicated
It’s complicated –
Although Einstein thought it up,
He couldn’t explain
He couldn’t explain
her refusal. She explained:
“You can’t spell champagne.”
You can’t spell champagne
Or that town in Illinois
Champaign, dontcha know