need a new system
click “Start” to “Shutdown”? Nonsense!
paging Steven Jobs
paging Steven Jobs?
is there a place I can find
an app to do that?
An app to do that?
Find the nearest whorehouses?
You’re such a sicko!
you’re such a sicko!
Watching Benny Hill reruns
in your boxer shorts
In your boxer shorts
you make like a two-man tent.
I don’t want to camp.
I don’t want to camp
Because often it’s intense
so the old joke says
so the old joke says
to get to the other side
the chicken did cross
the chicken did cross
himself when he witnessed a
poultry funeral
poultry funeral
gifts in your socks, rabbit eggs
holidays are weird
Holidays are weird
but no complaints come from me
I’ll take a day off!
I’ll take a day off!
feels like spring: birds sing, sun shines;
soon will come flowers.
soon will come flowers.
Mayflowers to bring Pilgrims
After April rains
After April rains
I’ll finally be forty
still hard to believe.
Still hard to believe
someone that young can be so
wise beyond her years.
Wise beyond her years?
I’m a graduate of the
school of harder knocks.
school of harder knocks
taught me to appreciate
using letter “N”
using letter “N”
Turns Kotter into Knotter
Teacher to Boy Scout
Teacher to Boy Scout:
“Are you prepared? 'Cause, if not
you’re, ummm…unprepared.”
“You’re ummm…unprepared.”
Wedding night bride to her groom.
Too much Jack Daniels.
Too much Jack Daniels
Is there even such a thing?
That’s just crazy talk.