I want the real reason
You clamped my testicles with
A pair of vise grips.
A pair of vice grips
Have just given me the most
Disturbing image.
Disturbing image:
Too much plastic surgery
For Tina Louise
For Tina Louise,
I will offer this advice:
Nobody is fooled!
Nobody is fooled
Two kids with long coat and beard
Won’t trick the doorman
“Won’t trick the doorman
He smells, plus he’s on duty”
said the prostitute
Said the prostitute,
“Who are you to judge me, sir?
You could have been me!”
“You could have been me!?”
You ain’t that good lookin’, son.
You ain’t that witty.
You ain’t that witty
I sighed, when I heard her say,
“Oh, shut the front door!”
Oh, shut the front door
This ain’t my first rodeo
Not in my wheelhouse
“Not in my wheelhouse!”,
I said; “No whistling, or you’ll
whistle up a storm!”
Whistle up a storm
Those River Kwai bridge guys did
A shitstorm, that is
A shitstorm; that is,
A tornado made of crap
A lot like your mom.
“A lot like your Mom.”
You clearly know her quite well
Are we related?
Are we related?
No way, Jose, you just aren’t
as handsome as me.
as handsome as me.
As handsome as I am is
more proper English.
More Proper English –
Spike Lee’s yet unfilmed sequel
To Mo’ Better Blues
To Mo’ Better Blues
I raise a toast (even though
I have not seen it)
I have not seen it.
I do not want to eat it:
Green Eggs, Ham and Milk
Green Eggs, Ham – and Milk –
(A film featuring Sean Penn,
star of I Am Sam)