“I’ll dress in layers -
My skin, your skin, and his skin.”
Buffalo Bill dreams.
Buffalo Bill dreams
Of Clarisse Starling’s soft skin
But she’ll shoot you dead
But she’ll shoot you dead –
Just be thankful her name’s not
Lorena Bobbitt.
Lorena Bobbit -
“If you plant it, he won’t come.”
Her own Field of Dreams.
Her own Field of Dreams
Look, everywhere, penises!
Testicular yard.
Testicular yard:
Don’t get tangled up in the
Epididymis
“Epididymis”:
Had to Google that. As it
Turns out, I have two.
Turns out, I have two.
I’m a bigamist. So What?
The Bible approves.
The Bible approves.
Jesus loves some but I say
What would my cat do?
What would my cat do?
They would eat, sleep, shit, or bug
the hell out of me.
The hell out of me:
Get busy casting, Merrin!
My name is Legion!
My name is Legion!
No, Region! Wait, no, Regis.
Yeah, Regis Drillbit.
Yeah, Regis Drillbit.
Did you see Regis Philbin
on TV last night?
On TV last night
Fallon was out-kayak’d by
Cameron Diaz.
Cameron Diaz
I wish she would get wed to
Kirk Cameron. Cool!
Kirk Cameron. Cool?
He’s Mr. Reverent now -
NO adultery.
No adultery
could make you feel as happy
as your right hand does
your right hand does what
could make you feel as happy
As adultery
(Tread, you’re not supposed to change the first line like that. It should match word for word the last line of my haiku, with possible rearranging of punctuation allowed)
(I’ll play off of Drew’s - Tread, it goes something like this)
As your right hand does,
So do your left and right feet.
The Hokey Pokey!