It’s the little room in the front of the plane where the pilots sit, but that’s not important right now.
Joey, have you ever been in a… in a Turkish prison?
Mayday! Mayday!
Mayday? What the hell does that mean?
Municipal bonds, Ted! I’m talking double A rating, the best investment in America.
Johnny, what’s happened so far?
Well, first the earth cooled. Then the dinosaurs roamed free !!!
All right, everybody get in your crash positions!
No wonder you’re upset. She’s lovely. And a darling figure… supple, pouting breasts… firm thighs. It’s a shame you two don’t get along.
When we reenlist, I’ll teach 'em baseball.
It’s Enrico Pallazzo!
(This is the only time I have ever literally fallen out of my seat laughing.)
Seven. Lt. Zip died this morning.
<spit take>
Mayday? Why, that’s the Russian New Year! I know: we’ll have a big parade and we’ll serve hot hors d’oeuvres…
All right, Striker, you listen, and listen close. Flying a plane is no different from riding a bicycle; it’s just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.
And I can sum it all up in just one word: courage, dedication, daring, pride, pluck, spirit, grit, mettle, and G-U-T-S guts. Why, Ted Striker’s got more guts in his little finger than most of us have in our large intestine. Including the colon!
So you knew him before he was a Captain?
Excuse me, stewardess, I speak jive.
Lookie here. I can dig grease ‘n chompin’ on some buns and draggin’ through the garden.
Nick, I’ve tried everything…the embassy, the German government, the consulate. I even talked to the U.N. ambassador. It’s no use. I just can’t bring my wife to orgasm.
I know. It all sounds like some bad movie.