green_dragon, it doesn’t matter what you or your friends think. What matters is what she thinks. If she is in a relationship with a guy she seems to be crazy for, forget about her. Take any feelings but your “just friends” feelings and bury them in a deep dark hole. It ain’t gonna happen. The sooner you realize this the sooner you can find a great single woman.
Thanks everyone for chiming in with the good advice and words of warning lol!
To clear a couple of things up…I’m not going to try and split her and her boyfriend up, I’m just enjoying the time we spend together and hoping that she does too…maybe someday soon more than she does with her boyfriend? I’m starting to get little indications that this might be the case as well…
I should mention that I met her as one of my dance students and since then a large part of the time we’ve spent together has been dancing with each other…so we’re starting to get very comfortable physically.
Whatever is actually going on she’s doing a damn good job of leading me around…meeting for late night walks, coming over at 10 pm to watch films and not leaving till 2 am…etc etc. Before people jump in and say that she’s just leading me on, I’ve been lead on before and I know the type of girl who plays that game, and she doesn’t seem like that kind of girl.
Thanks again!
Ahhhh, the wonders of having more information. Ignore what I said before. I’m a dumb monkey. :smack:
Talk to her and get her to clarify her feelings for you. I don’t think she is purposely leading you on. She simply not realize what she is doing. Besides, asking is much safer than trying to interpret her little signs.
This happens because when a person is in a stable long term relationship and is spending time with someone with whom they are comfortable with who understands that they are in a stable long term relationship, they no longer have to watch themselves in the same way. She can behave a certain way with green_dragon that she can’t with a stranger because he already knows that she is unavailable. In this way, ironically and sometimes painfully, the very unavailability itself can sometimes provoke feelings that seek to reject the fact of that unavailability.
Believe me, this is what’s going on here. She knows she can dance with you, watch movies with you, take walks with you, and so forth because she trusts that you understand that there is nothing between the two of you. Were you to confront her with your feelings she would be horrified and you would be Instant Gigantic Asshole[sup]TM[/sup].
And if she DOES enjoy the time with you, let her come around to it, rather than you nudging her. Otherwise, she’ll just wind up talking to her boyfriend about all the weirdos who “You’re nice to, you know, and then they LOVE YOU all of a sudden.”
Women are like a fish on a five pound line. You have to bring em in real slow and careful-like…and then…BAM! You net em and put em in your ice chest. In a metaphorical sense.