Originally posted by Bathyscaphefan, June 20, 1960
Well, finally got to the bottom of the Mariana Trench, and spent 20 minutes there. I wonder if anybody will ever remember or care about it, forty or fifty years from now.
Great Debates - 1834
I can’t believe Jackson nominated Taney for the Supreme Court. The guy is just a party hack who helped the administration close the National Bank and caused this depression we’re still trying to get out of. Yeah, there’s a great credit for the resume. And does Jackson seriously think he’ll get Taney past the senate? They already voted him down once when Jackson tried to make him Treasurer; why are they going to put him on the Supreme Court. Hell, at his age he could still be writing decisions in 1857.
Posted by Allmighty Oct. 24, 6006 B.C.
So here’s my thought. I’m gonna create this thing called a Universe, in it, I’m gonna make a ball of mud called… Earth, yea that’s it. Then I’m gonna put this little replicas of me on there and then fuck with their minds for a few thousand years.
Posted by Allmighty July. 12, 4029 B.C.
Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. I mean the elephants and monkeys and kangaroos are cool, but those humans just suck. You know, I think I’ll just wipe em out and start all over a again. Well this one guy Noah seems ok.
Posted by Allmighty Mar. 1, 30 A. D.
Any doper parents out there having this trouble. I never see my kid. You see his mother and I havn’t been together since conception. She’s married to someone else who treats him fine, but he is my kid. The big problem is now he’s going around telling everyone to listen to him and to follow him. I mean, I’m glad he’s a leader but he should have a little more respect for people.
…
Posted by Son of the God Ra, in the twelfth year of my reign
BBQ Pit
*I don’t care if he was part of the family once. Aunt Bythia was probably lying anyway, saying the gods sent him to her. Yea, right, he looks a lot like that slave guy she had “fanning” her all the time.
Stupid bastard is getting the priests all worked up with his hokey “miracles”. The slaves in Goshen are getting totally out of hand too, and the head architect says his projects are weeks behind.
And now this piece of crocodile dung has the nerve to demand release for “his people” from slavery! My informers have told me there’s a strike in the works, and the slaves are having a lamb feast tonight!
That’s the last straw(heh, heh, I made a funny). I’m going to take my oldest son with me and go show those upstarts whose really boss around here.*
Posted October 24, 1415:
Posted on September 13th, 1835 by ChuckieD:
I got a turtle! He’s a beaut! I hope he survives on the long trip home.
Posted on July 15th, 1962 by Swingin London Lad
I saw this goddawful band this weekend called The Rolling Stones :rolleyes: . The lead singer looks like he could french kiss a moose. Couldn’t understand a word they were singing. Whatever happened to decent musicians who sang properly?
I was up against the stage all night with my girl, keeping her from the leering eyes of those blokes.
Worst concert ever. Cost me half a crown to get into the club, too. What a ripoff!
Posted on July 28, 1981 in BBQ by BlueEyedDi
OMG! I can’t beleive he is still serious about his ex!!!1111!!! Fer christ sake we are getting married tomorrow! The invites are out, my face is on the freakin’ tea towels! It’s not like I can call the whole thing off…
posted in GQ February 1997 by MonicaL:
How do I get spooje out of my favorite dress?
And later in GQ posted by JohnGoodmansSister
Is it morally wrong to secretly tape record a convo of someone who you know is jacking off a married man?
and later on in MPSIMS by 42
I just smoked the best cigar …
and later in BBQ Pit by WhiteWaterWench
He can’t keep his dick in his pants for 5 minutes! I would divorce him in a heartbeat if I didn’t want to rule the world some day!
Posted in MPSIMS at December 7th, 1941: 650am by Gunny
God! I hate insomnia! I’ve been up all night on this ship, tossing and turning in my bunk and listening to the guys fart and snore.
Thankfully I have Sunday off. After I sleep a few hours I’m going to prowl around Pearl Harbor for some action.
Dear Sir,
I wish to complain on the stronglyest possible terms about the previous entry in this board that has someone attempting to pass himself as the researcher that did go to the Mariana’s Trench, I was the one. My best friend Donald Walsh would not dare to use such a silly name like that, only a FEW of my friends are that batty.
Yours faithfully,
Jacques Auguste Piccard, Swiss physicist, Mrs.
Posted in MPSIMS January 1962 by ItsAllSmoot2Me
Last night I got laid 365 times!
From the files of 1953: by Frank In Kansas
I’m not sure why I started it, but once I did, I couldn’t stop! I just made a ball of twine bigger than my bowling ball…I wonder how long I can keep it going?
BBQ Pit in 1660 by Mr. Gravity
Whilst No One Tupp Me Or Whilst Thy Die A Geeks Death?
MPSIMS in 1935 by Schrödinger
My cat died yesterday.
Originally posted on February 9, 1950:
Posted on December 19th, 2005:
Oh man, I’m going to hell. There it is.
…
[in 1936 by Schrödinger]
I’m bumping this thread. I was looking in the box where the cat died, and the damnedest thing…
1010 BCE= by Oedipus in IMHO: Should I try to find my birth parents?
1009 BCE by Oedipus in MPSIMS: Guess Who Just Got into a Fight and Got a New Job on the Same Day?
1000 BCE by Oedipus in BBQ Pit: So Help Me I’m Gonna Find the Motherfucker who’s Causing This Pestilence!
999 BCE by Oedipus in MPSIMS: Well, The Good News Is I Just Found Out I’m Not an Only Child After All
October 1978 from MPSIMS by PadreKarole
I just got a promotion!!!
1926 by Norma Desmond- BBQ Pit: What the Fuck Do We Need to HEAR What the Actors are Saying For? [bumped by Eve, 2001]
April 4, 1994 by MediaCynic in Cafe Society: “If Kurt Cobain is So Sick and Tired Of Fame and Fortune, Why Doesn’t He Just Give it All Up?”
October 31, 1993 by TeenChick in Cafe Society: “River Phoenix: He’s Hot and He’s a Clean Living Vegan! I’m in Love!”
1915, Woodrow Willie in Cafe Society: “Birth of a Nation: WOW! It’s Like History Writ By Lightning!”
December 1, 1955 by AlabamaTraditionalist in BBQ PIT:
I’LL FUCKING SHOW YOU, BITCH!
The horrifying thing is that somewhere in Montgomery on December 1, 1955, somebody really did make a similar rant.
Thread started in MPSIMS December 24, 1945 at 7:15 pm by **Mossback George:
I just found out I’m worth more dead than alive.**
-Originally posted in Great Debates on April 3, 1898