Hoping for Ten Inches

Actually, I’m hoping for much more than that. Something in the area of 36 inches would be perfect.

You see, I live on the East Coast where the media has worked themselves into a frenzy of contrived euphemisms and cheesed up graphics. The weather IS the news here. My local station is running clips full time of poor saps standing in the wind and precipitation, trying to be heard over the howling gales. What are they doing there? Well, they’re describing the wind and precipitation, of course. Apparently, it’s easier for some of us to look at the tv than it is to look out the window.

In any case, setting the whole “using the weather as hype to get ratings” thing aside (sort of), this had BETTER be a good storm. Because I’ve been told to expect a whopper. So I went to the grocery store. I searched the remainders on the shelves for the last scraps of nutrition that the previous herd of scavengers missed. I dug through a dairy case, desperately foraging for the LAST container of fat free yogurt, like the soul survivor of some type of weather holocaust, only to come up empty handed.

Then I got in line for 40 minutes behind people with 80 bottles of water in their carts, and wild-eyed doomsday cult expressions on their faces. “The end is near,” their faces said to me as they purchased the fat free yogurt which should have rightfully been mine.

But most importantly of all, I planned for a day off. Yes, it’s bad enough if I bought extra toilet paper for no good reason. But I will not be denied my snow day! I WILL have my day at home with my firewood, my cats, my trampoline, and my books to entertain myself. I will not be lied to again! My wait in line must be vindicated. My toilet paper purchase must be justified. I must have at LEAST 10 inches!

Don’t wake me up to tell me I’ve received any less. The repercussions could be dire.


You know, in between the thread title and your username, I was expecting bad porno spam.

Oh, well. Carry on.

Sorry to disappoint you. I will try to do better in the future.

I had the same reaction as andygirl.

We should hijack this one so that it becomes a bad porno scam!

Don’t hijack me! Please! I’ll be good, I swear. I knew that my amazing powers of advertising would draw unwitting perverts to my post, but I intended no harm. The impending snow storm is of major importance to me. An entire days work rests in the balance.

[Otto the bus driver]
Man, that’s just blatant false advertisement, man!
[/Otto the bus driver]

Here’s hoping, that unlike a bad gay personal ad, you get the advertised inches.

I want them too! i want another snow day. I know i’m greedy but stiiiiilll…And also, NO delays. Thank you.

:being nice and talking about the weather:

Ten inches gets you a snow day in Boston? Huh. We had at least that from our big storm earlier this winter and my main highway was mostly dry pavement the next morning. No doubt the schools were closed, but work was pretty much normal. Stocking up? Pfft. I think much of the bottled water was gone from the local supermarket, but everything else was normal.

I guess every area has its budgetary priorities… ours just happens to be snowplows and salt.

Anyway, hope you have a safe snow day…

My perversion is both deliberate and willful.

Oops, sorry, that’s more than 10 inches. :smiley: (Sorry to call to mind that scene folks … Carry on, carry on.)

SexyWriter, I’m from the Boston area too, so I’ll ask you this: why do people stock up before a storm? Don’t you usually keep a fair amount of food in your house anyway? Do you think it’s likely that the storm will keep you housebound for more than a week?

I’ve heard stories of the Blizzard of '78, but sheesh… we haven’t gotten that much snow ever since.

Not trying to offend, just curious… :slight_smile:

Look here: I just had to drive three hours through that snow storm that was rackin’ up the East coast on Sunday night. Rain, snow, slush. They had every flavor of precipitation. I think it was even hailing at one point. And you know where I was driving towards? West Virginia of all places!

In other words, I say we should turn this into a porn thread, 'cuz I’m quite frankly sick of snow.

Now that’s a sig if anyone wants it!

Oh, yeah, and mrblue92: yinz in Pittsburgh don’t get anything compared to what we get in northwest PA. I’ve seen the whole city closed because of an minor icestorm for cryin’ out loud. Didn’t that happen after the last PittDope?

Well, I went to the grocery store because I happened to be out of toilet paper. I figured it was probably a good idea to have some around. Otherwise, I’m not really sure why everyone stampedes to the grocery store to stock up with a year’s supply of MY fat free yogurt. Please see my reference to slack jawed, bleary eyed doomsday cult members.

Now about that whole Dirk Diggler thing…


I was going to start my own post about this, but I guess I’ll chime in. In New York City all the news stations are trying to outdo their storm coverage with reporters scattered all over the region. And so this mega storm that was supposed to begin yesterday and go until tomorrow, has proven to be a dusting. An icy dusting, but a dusting nonetheless.

Now I would like an apology from the news people for ruining people’s flights and the aggravation of cancelled school, but I’m not getting that. Barring that, I’d like them to not cover this as a story anymore. Our Vice President is in a hospital and some 15 year old shot up a school in San Diego, and Newschannel 4 says, that even though this isn’t the storm we expected, it’s still a hell of an event. No it’s not. You’ve just got all this graphic to use and improved dopplar stuff that no one needs. Simply a shame…

Hey, guys, I know you all aren’t getting any, but it’s not fair to hijack this poor woman’s thread for your perversion. Sexywriter is NOT talking about bad gay porn, she is NOT talking good gay porn, she is NOT talking about useless spam, she will NOT eat green eggs and ham.

So…now that we’ve got the hooligans out of this thread, I must know. When you do get those 10 inches of snow, you thinking about making any nekkid snow angels? What about a little boom-chica-boom-bow-wow-wow by a roaring fire?

Well, you know your friends from the north are standing by to help.

Yup, we’ll send a squadron of Armed Forces personnel to come down…

and stand around and giggle at you.

But 10 inches is too many inches…I live in Central California. I don’t like snow. And ten inches is still too many inches.

Hey, I’m going home next Monday. :stuck_out_tongue:

An entire squadron? But all I wanted was ten inches! Wow…the mind boggles.

Well sexy…we all want ten inches, but most of us have to settle for six.