Is it too late?
Did I just woosh myself?
Preview…
Dammit! :smack: 
If you find out, let me know. I’ve been sitting in this chair since 12/2000, and I really have to go to the bathroom.
Stage 1: Collect Underwear
Stage 2: …
Stage 3: Profit!
Just gotta watch out for the Christina Aguilera monsters.
If you ever get away, will you grab me a pack of smokes and a can of Mountain Dew please?
Easy. Sign up for Worlds of Warcraft.
- Buy a GPS.
- Go to this site .
Getting hit by a car did it for me. For about a week, I obviously couldn’t read the board as I was in the hospital but when I came home, I still wasn’t that interested due to what I assume was post surgical depression. That’s lifted a bit in the past week though and I’m back to posting at similar levels pre-accident.
So, my advice to you you is to go find a slow moving car and jump in front of it.
Well, there is a way to rid yourself of the SDMB spell.
It requires some live fish, a cow, a single rubber glove and bacon grease. :eek:
Now, first, remove all your clothes… huh? what? whisper whisper
Never Cecil! The truth must be known! They must learn how to break… OWW!
CRASH! BIFF! SQUIRT! SQUIRT! POOF! oww… hey, where are those fingers going?.. oww… SMACK! KRUNCH!
<some time later>
Why do you want to leave? Come join us. This is a happy place.
I understand each of those words individually, but together they don’t compute. Can someone please explain? 
You mean you don’t have a bucket?!
You’ve been here a week or so? Then it’s already too late for you. You’ve been thoroughly infected.
Before long you will be demanding cites from your family and friends when they say something outrageous. You will be telling people about this great thread you read on this message board you hang out on. You will refer to your fellow Dopers and be confused when people think you’re hanging out with the (drug) addicts. You will try to get all your friends and family to at least read the Dope, because otherwise you’ll find them too boring to talk to. You will swear by Og. Occassionally you will smash things. You will wave hi to Opal.
You will go to DopeFests. You will marry a Doper and produce a second-generation Doper-kid, who will go on to marry another Doper-kid and produce a third-generation Doper, who will be so smart, intelligent, and knowledgable that the world will demand s/he be their ruler forevermore.
You are already one of us, so you might as well pony up the $14.95 now. You will anyway.
There’s a very simple way to stop browsing the SDMB. You can try it right now, in fact. Just follow these easy instructions;
[ol]
[li]Open a DOS window.[/li][li]Type “Format C:”[/li][li]hit “return” a few times.[/li][li]Enjoy your new ‘Blinking Cursor’ wallpaper.[/li][/ol]
I tapered off after about eight months on hte boards. Then I tapered back on. I’m nearing the peak of my third trip through the cycle.
I second ccwaterbacks request for Mountain Dew, I live in the UK and they don’t sell it here anymore 
My gf did get me some from spain though
All while getting embarrassingly drunk!
laughs hysterically
Spend less time here. Yeah, whew! That was a good one! Keep 'em coming like that, and you’ll be popular here in no time.
Wait a sec, you were serious? Oh. Well, good luck. Just wait until they introduce you to the rituals. You will be chained to your seat.
[sub]It’s figurative! They take the chains off later! Seriously! I only gnawed off one arm by the time they did it, too![/sub]
Well, the longest I went since I joined was when I was away from all computers - the backwoods of Kentucky, the first two weeks at college when the network was down the dorms, etc.
My advice? Don’t hurt yourself. I busted my ankle earlier this week so the six-plus hours a week I usually spend working out? Yeah, here.
An hour a day?
Sure, an hour a day at work should give you about all the time you need here. Some days you may need to cut that hour at work a little short if you are posting in some fast developing threads or if you have posted something you want to check frequently.
I have found that if I organize my hour away from the boards really well I can get my work, housekeeping (what’s that?), cooking, shopping and other leisure activities completed. My husband is a little frustrated with me but I have slotted him some time in on my hour away from the boards next Wednesday.
Yeah, an hour will work. It just takes a little organization.
Why would anyone want to stop? My next step is to get a certain someone to post here. He will be irresistibly drawn in just like I was.
{Chanting} One of usss! One of usss!
So, if this is a cocktail party, where’s my martini? {dirty, Bombay Sapphire if you’ve got it. Thanks}