So here’s what happened. The bad, then the good.
Thursday night was a second bachelor party. I spent way too much money, drank way too much beer, and had an overall fantastic time. As we were leaving a strip club, I ran into a girl I went to grade school with and haven’t seen in like 10 years. I bent down to hug her goodbye and somehow started making out with her. I’m not entirely sure how that transistion was made, but I’m blaming it on her. I broke it off pretty quick, saying I was far too drunk to make out. She agreed and I went on my way.
Since my special-lady-friend-pseudo-girlfriend went to gradeschool with this girl too, I told her I saw her, but left out the detail about the kiss. Leaving out details like that is a rookie mistake and one I’ve made in about relationship I’ve been in. She found out about the kiss and was a bit… I don’t know… upset or jealous or angry or something. She laughed it off and just kept giving me shit about it over and over and over. I don’t think the kiss was a huge deal, but I probably should have told her about it myself.
Anyway, so because of this little incident, I was planning on skipping “The Talk” until things had calmed down from that small speed bumb.
So the wedding comes and we’re having a great time. I take her out for a slow dance and she starts giving me a hard time about the drunken kiss again. I apologize profusely for not telling her, and that kind of transitioned into her and my relationship and what we owe each other as “friends”, or if we’re even “just friends” or whatever. So by the end of the song, I asked her what she’d say if I asked her on a date. She didn’t answer directly, but said something like “well, are you asking me on a date, or are asking if I would accept a date?” Finally I just had to do it. I asked. She accepted graciously and we kissed on the dance floor, much to the surprise of all our mutual friends in attendance who had no idea anything was going on at all between her and I.
But it was adorable. I’m sure I looked like an excited school boy when she accepted, and I kept talking about how I needed to make a good first impression and clean my car to pick her up. She just laughed at me. I told her I’d take her to a nice place, but she said McDonald’s would be alright. I admitted that I was insanely nervous about asking her out, and had been putting it off for months because I’m a wuss and was afraid of rejection. She looked at me kind of crooked and said “you really thought I’d say no? You’re crazy.”
The rest of the night she kept saying it was weird that we were going on a date. I told her she was probably right, but it’ll be a good thing.
Anyway, fantastic night, and fastastic advice from the Dopers. Thanks for the extra bit of confidence that I needed to get that question out. It wasn’t nearly as easy as it probably should have been.
It seems like the two of you have already pretty much been doing the friend part.
But her answer says it all. Be bold. No one wants someone wishy-washy. “I’m only going to ask you out if you if I know in advance you’ll accept.” Doesn’t cut it. Now, this line acutally works sometimes, when said flirtingly with confidence, and not as a poll. It actually can work well when propositing. “So would you go to bed with me if I asked?” 