Hun, Please tell me your mom will throw you out for having a boyfriend _before_ I become your first

She could be trying to scare him.

While also saying, “It’s not your fault, you’ve done nothing wrong, due to developmental issues my daughter just isn’t mature enough to have a boyfriend”? I don’t think so.

Okay, I’ve just come up with a rule of thumb:

If you can’t have a relationship with someone without getting in their pants, then you’re not ready for a serious relationship.

I’m 47 and I would still be a virgin if I hadn’t been involved with women not fitting these conditions.

OK, I’m a bit of an outlier on this one, but seriously? That’s not sensible advice for a 18 yo. . .Most of his potential partners won’t fit them for a long time.

Does a lemonade stand count?

The “secure place to live” and “birth control” would have been helpful at least - revealing after having sex that “oh hey, mom will totally throw me out of the house if she even finds out I have a BF, much less what she’ll do if she finds out you fucked me” falls under the “secure place to live” category.