eight thousand, four hundred sixty-seven grains of sand.
eight thousand, four hundred sixty-eight grains of sand.
eight thousand, four hundred sixty-nine grains of sand.
eight thousand, four hundred seventy grains of sand.
soooooooooooo relaxed.
i hope Delta-9 likes the full set of bar tools and blenders i carved out of palm wood for her. i’d go there, but it’s just too much effort to get up right now.
what else could i contribute.
…popcorn machine.
…bar-ca-lounger.
::unzips Angie’s tent and looks out side:: Boy am I sore and stiff this morning, what’s that Angie? Yes stiff in that way ::sighs and rezips tent saying :: The sacrifices I make.
How ironic, I was mistaken for a dude, excuse me, Duuuuuude, and I make the same gender slip.
How can I make it up to you?
Back rub? Extra sports channels on the flat-screen digital TV I made for you from half-dozen cookie sheets and left-over tin foil?
Odieman pops out of his tent and hands delta9 some viagra and says “Use it for good and not evil.” He pats delta on the shoulder and goes back into the tent.
I figure I have time for two before my post-mid-afternoon-but-not-quite-time-for-my-evening-nap nap.
Oh and as Minister of Naps my first official proclamation is that two naps a day are mandatory (but only if you feel like it). People found exceeding this limit will be rewarded. Most likely with a combination of wine, (wo)men, and/or song, depending on your personal preference.
Now if you’ll excuse me all this policy making has made me thirsty.
I hereby present myself as candidate for the position of Minister of Information Infrastructure.
This position would be in charge of the Island web pages, domain registration, and local-area network (said network being the well-known “jungle telegraph”).
It would of course have to liase with the Ministry of Finance, for the proper disposal of rhe revenue from offshore domain registrations in the .kb top-level domain to be set up.
And we could set up a thriving industry of hand-carved coconut-and-palm-leaf webservers and other trinkets for the tourist market, through a liaison with the Ministry of Tourism.
So far we have:
Me: Ultimate ruler
Sue: Minister in charge of Social Policy
beagledave - bikini inspector - Vice regent
SkySlash - Cheif policy maker
scheech-owl - Minister of natural resources
demo - Quality control commisioner
ren - executive in charge of Culture
Black Night - minister of finance
Delta-9 - entertaiment coordinator/cruise director
iampunha - cheif shirt inspector
gollum - resident Unga Bunga etcetera manager
Silver Fire - brew mistress
gunslinger - minister of defence
Odieman - head concubine.
Angkins - Viagra distribution coordinator
rjk - hammock inspector ( we have a beach inspector- schreech-owl)
ssskuggiii - minister of tanning oil/ suntan lotion application
SILENTBOB - executive puppeteer (???)or whatever he wants to be
Welfy - island minstrel, reporting to Delta-9
Zoggie - monkey butler trainer - (yeah monkey butlers!!)
Relic_11Resident icemaker/bartender
Sailorboy - relic’s assistant
Adnoctum - head abarista (?)
AuntiPam - cheif storyteller
Corvus - Minister of Napping/cabana boy
Tristan - citizen
Shadowfox - rich bored lecherous housewife
BornDodgy - Minister of Security of GNP (fox in the henhouse!)
Byzantine - eccentric senator
Palm Cove - head meterologist
FairyChatMom - supervisor of lifeguards!
Diane - trainer of naughty monkey butlers
Blessedwolf - Horticultural Adviser to Her Majesty…
Still to be confirmed:
Satan:ambassador in charge of cultural import
Coldfire: export commisioner
Colin Wilkinson - public relations liason
Doobieous - plane greeter
Homer - resident delinquent
Does anyone want to help creat policy? Or would we rather just have the drunken party
:: DW walks out of the jungle dragging a pig who has since gone to the Great Mud Hole In The Sky ::
No party is complete without some good food, so I hereby appoint myself Minister Of Barbecuing.
Silver Fire, do you have a spare apple for this beast’s mouth? Oh, and some wine to make gravy with.
I also have a large selection of appetizers, tacos, blintzes, cakes, and cookies, and I’ll handle any special orders that we would like cooked up.
I’ve got a 50 gallon barrel of Canola Oil, but…
:: looks around at all the scantily clad women, spots the tents ::
…I’m thinking of some other use besides cooking.
And for dessert…
Hey, Demo, I’m baking some brownies, and I’ve got a very special recipe that I could use your help with.
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