:smack:
Just so all you well-meaning advisors know, there’s a whole saga going in the Pit about this so-called relationship. Head’s up. Pyjama pants.
Yeah, don’t do anything like check the facts or anything. Just freak out and chuck a year-long relationship with someone you spend 5 days a week with (this is the OP’s claim… they spend all weekend together, every weekend, leaving plenty of time to cheat, right?).
I read the pit thread… :dubious: There are plenty of married men who manage to cheat during working hours ya know. I see it as the OP is rather…niave and getting a hard lesson myself. Maybe not, I’ll concede, but I am choosing to go with niave over “pyjama pants” as you phrase it.
When they’re just dating some broke girl? Why?
Why shouldn’t the OP check the website and see if he’s logged in? So easy to do, nothing to lose by doing it. Maybe that site just hijacks his browser and opens a window. IT HAPPENS. I HAVE SEEN IT HAPPEN. It’s very annoying, but if that’s what’s happening and he’s as computer-clueless as she claims (as she HAS to claim for this story to work) and she dumps him on everyone’s hair-trigger advice, wouldn’t that be incredibly stupid and horrible?
Don’t you think she’d have noticed a similar thing on her own computer, given that they met on that site?!
Doot-doo-doot-do-do…Pyjamapants…Doot-do-do-do…
She probably has Pop Up Stopper or something computer savvy like that. He likely doesn’t.
Possible, in that case her anti popup/spyware records should be checked, to see what they have been blocking… If there is no popup blocker, (and no odd history on her computer) or the program hasn’t blocked that site, than it lends credence to my idea. If so, than you get the balance of credibility.
OK, wait… you met him on this site. He hates porn, but he might be looking on this site for porn. What? Which dating website has porn on it? Why was he meeting women on there if he thinks the site is disgusting?
I’m confused.
Women troll for sex? Which ones? Where? Huh?
Yes. If he’s real. There are people who actually do use this kind of Jedi manipulation. This is a crucial moment. If you fall for this once, he’ll do it forever.
Probably.
Not just get out of it, but get control. Get power.
Absolutely.
It’s disturbing that you would even have to ask. Yes, Dump him, and tell him he’s a liar. Don’t let him think you even have a a moment of doubt about yourself.
I swear this was some Eddie Murphy movie plot years ago. He gets caught cheating, then turns it on her.
Dumperoo.
Speaking as a guy, this guy sounds like a mentally-abusive cocksucker. As Dan Savage would say, DTMFA. You should not put up with this type of treatment for one minute longer.
from here
This wouldn’t be the guy in question in this thread, would it? That would go a long way toward explaining why you knew what his ex-gf got as a birthday present and why you didn’t balk at him for getting an ex a gift. If it was a different guy, I’m just baffled by that.
This is not a site you log into. Plus, there is no way it will hijack your browser. It’s a site like craigslist, but local to the city, where people put up ads with anonymous emails and you can respond to them via email.
He works from home. He has plenty of time during the day to fool around with anyone.
I’m also sick of hearing the “pyjama pants” reference… despite the fact that it’s not even how one should be spelling “pajama”… and I don’t even know what this is referring to, except some fake story someone posted once? I really think this is an unfair comparison to throw out to someone who is new to the boards and looking for honest appraisals to an argument that she’s considering breaking off a one-year relationship about… that is very important to her… if you don’t think you can respond without comparing me unfairly and impossibly vaguely to a previous poster, please refrain! Thanks.
So you were snooping I mean “fixing” your bf’s computer and found something you didn’t like. Stay with him your perfect for each other.
Same guy. It’s a more complicated situation that I summed up for that thread. He was dating us both for a short amount of time, but she knew about this, so it wasn’t clandestine.
And no, I was legitimately fixing his internet. He’s clueless with computers, which explains why I had to do it in the first place, and why he was inordinately sloppy about cleaning up evidence of browsing this site.
Why did you look at the list of recently opened items?
You seem to have decent communication skills, so what I don’t understand is why you don’t just talk to him about the issues you’ve been having. You can drive yourself crazy analyzing things and making guesses. Wouldn’t it be so much easier to sit him down and flat out ask him what the deal is with the no Christmas present and the website?
Are you scared of him? Or are you just hopelessly in love with him and afraid that he’ll dump you if you question him in a serious manner? After a year with someone, the inability to broach these subjects tells me that there’s definitely something wrong with you, him, and/or the relationship.