What Phlosphr said is spot on. I’m on my 27th day sober and have dropped 11 pounds just by not drinking.
By drink of choice was beer and that averages at about 130 calories per drink.
I drank about 20-25 per week. Yowza.
I am not at this time, the main reason being that if I am trying to get a handle on myself first before I commit to 90 in 90. I am under the VERY close care of a therpist though.
I also fear that if I get in the car by myself to drive somewhere I may stop at the liquor store.
I just calculated that one mickey of vodka and one bottle of red wine (my drinks of choice) have about 800 calories each in them. No wonder I gained weight!
Hey just wanted to say congratulations on going sober and good luck to you. And also to all the other people who said they took that path. When it gets tough, remember that there are hundreds of people all over the world pulling for you. The Internet is good for more than just wasting time on.
Keep it going EmAnj I want you to stick with this so much. Thanks Shirley I know the day is coming soon.
We went for dinner last night as a last minute thing with a friend we hadn’t seen in a while. I was a bit anxious on the way to the restaurant because I always drink with dinner. But my fiance (I’ll call him D) didn’t drink so I felt totally comfortable having a virgin drink then coffee. The guy we had dinner with ordered a beer and it seemed like he felt bad for drinking when we weren’t, so he only drank 3/4 of it then switched to pop.
So, successful so far at day 5! I have my doctor’s appointment later this morning to arrange for my medical leave and to get a full physical.
I am starting to have trouble sleeping even though I’m very tired at night. I tossed and turned for about 2 hours this morning, starting at 6 am. It’s now just after 8 and I finally got sick of just laying there and got up. I’m tired, BUT, I haven’t been up this early on a weekend in forever, AND I’m not hungover! This feels good.
I also wanted to add that I’m thinking of you, The Chao Goes Mu. I hope you’re doing well this morning! Keep strong!
I use dye-free Benedryl. No nasty hangover effect, and quite harmless, and is not addictive. And that is what you need to be aware of…those OTC drugs that can be habit forming like sleeping pills.
For insomnia, a benedryl should be fine to knock you out when you need it.
IANAD.
I would caution against benadryl, frankly. I’ve seen recovering folks shift their abuse to many stranger substances than benadryl. But I do recall one woman who used about a gram a day of benadryl in order to ‘feel better’ all the while going to AA meetings and proclaiming herself sober.
It eventually caught up with her in the form of a relapse.
I too found myself using benadryl too, to sleep at first, then just to make myself feel different. Then I ended up going back to booze and pills.
Sudafed too is a frequent choice for people to abuse, or try to. As is dextromethorphan (another drug I abused).
I’ve seen prednisone, clonidine, nifedipine, and even hytrin (for enlarged prostates) get abused by us alkies looking desperately for something ‘safe’ to make us feel different.
The best treatment for sleeplessness is continued abstinence, time, physical activity, a sensible diet, and adherence to a regular schedule. Watch the caffeine intake too, and minimize that.
I’ve heard this same advice from many other sources. I offer my own support for this position.
At this point, it’s probably wiser for you to suffer minor inconveniences such as insomnia than to take the risk of replacing one drug with another, and simply continuing your pattern of behaviors.
Some other suggestions for dealing with insomnia: work out daily; keep a dry text near your bed (I can recommend a print out of any chapters of the Code of Federal Regulations, even if you’re professionally interested in the matter it’s a soporific of the highest quality.); or self hypnosis (I can describe one simple method for that via email or PM, if you’re interested.).
Would you mind posting it here? I’d like to know as well. (Also an insomniac, though not a recovering alcoholic one.)
And **EmAnJ **and The Chao Goes Mu, you should be very proud of yourselves. I hope things continue to go well for the both of you.
My own take for dealing with early morning insomnia (as opposed to “inability to fall asleep”) is getting out of bed. Mom wakes up 2-3 times every night at unsocial times and when she finds herself tossing and turning afterwards, she gets out of bed and grabs a book; she’s got a few which are pretty much guaranteed to drop her like a brick in five minutes flat.
Sure. Though I’m not sure how well it will work for you. But even if it wont put you to sleep, it will relax you, and be of some benefit that way, I hope.
Begin by lying down.
Focus on your breathing, and will yourself to slow, deep breathing. Your heart rate should also draw down to your normal resting rate.
Now, close your eyes, and focus on your forehead. Tense all the muscles there, and hold them tensed for a period of about ten to fifteen heartbeats, or three to five breaths. I never found that it matters what the specific period was, but you want it to be something you can keep standard, while relaxing and keeping your eyes closed.
After your period ends, relax the muscles of your forehead.
Repeat the tensing, hold, and release one or two more times. Only tensing your forehead. It’s harder than it sounds, but that’s also part of the key to this - you’re going to be working down your body, tensing muscle groups or pairs of muscle groups in tandem, but only that specific set of muscles, you want to let the rest of your body relax.
All this time I’ve always found I am thoroughly aware of my own breathing, and it’s very easy to keep it at a constant rate.
When you finish with your forehead, move on to your jaw, or cheeks if you prefer. Repeat the same process of tensing, holding and relaxing with your next chosen muscle group.
Slowly work down your body, taking things in as small a group of muscles you feel that you can voluntarily control, by themselves. Tensing, holding, and relaxing each group, and letting it alone once you’ve finished with it.
For myself, by the time I get through with my feet I find I’m thoroughly relaxed, and it is simplicity itself to allow sleep to take me.
I’ve heard this called both self-hypnosis or simply relaxation techniques. No one I’ve ever described it to has ever said it has any dangers associated with it, so even if it won’t help you sleep, you’ll just be out some twenty or thirty minutes, and feeling more relaxed for it.
I hope it will be able to help you, supergoose, and EmAnJ, should she choose to use it.
ETA: One more thing, you really have to focus on what you’re making your body do. You can’t be doing this and thinking about anything else for it to work. If you’ll bear me sounding kinda woo-woo, you have to have your mind and body working together on this.
Be prepared for them to think you’ve had a hysterectomy. That was the standard gossip when a woman took unspecified medical leave at my former place of employ. Then, someday, if you decide to have a baby, watch the jaws drop!
Thank you OtakuLoki , I will try it. I should tell you that I’ve had a very long history with insomnia (15+ years) and have tried everything: keeping a routine, reading in bed, not reading in bed, sleeping in a cool room, sleeping in a warm room, warm bath, warm milk, journaling, meditation, dealing with it, sleeping pills, etc., BUT, now is as good of a time as any to re-try everything.
This is very likely considering I have a (not super private) history of miscarriages. My boss knows this and will probably assume it has something to do with that.
Also, D and I got into a major fight this morning on the way to the doctor over stupid directions. It ended in him telling me to get out of the truck and me taking my bank card back from him so I could take a cab home. He parked and followed me in the parking lot yelling at me (people were looking - VERY embarrassing) and him saying a few things I’m sure he didn’t mean. I know he’s under tons of stress from this and is very angry about it, but that certainly didn’t help. However, through it all, even though I had flashes of ‘Fuck this, I’m getting drunk tonight’, I also had flashes of ‘No, I’m doing this for ME and I don’t want to fail.’ So even though I went and got groceries by myself and the liquor store was right there, I didn’t even look in that direction. Major win for me.
I’m sorry to hear that it’s a long-term problem for you. I know insomnia sucks. I hope that can help.
(My problem is that I rarely remember it when I’m staring at the ceiling and unable to sleep…)
That’s very, very true. Congrats on dealing well with a stressful situation, and one that you could have used as an excuse to go back to using.
(hugs)
Excellent! This is one of my methods, too, but I learned to start with the feet and work up instead of the head and work down.
I also find that counting back from 100, while visually drawing the numbers in my mind’s eye works.
With any of these, practice makes the calm come sooner. After a while, simply starting the exercise can get you where you need to go.
Don’t BS around, decide that, this, is hitting bottom; not when he leaves you. Get help.
Alcohol may have been contributing to your insomnia. You may “pass out” but it’s not real sleep (the way sleep is supposed to be). Let yourself dry out a bit more. You may find that your natural sleep gets better.
Wait a fucking minute. He kicks you out of the car, embarrasses you in public, and you say HE is under stress. Girlfriend, stop making excuses for his abusive behavior. Yes, it is mental abuse, and do not see it as anything else.
Many people say they want you to change, but they are really trying to maintain the status quo. Maybe he likes you better as an alcoholic. He can feel so damn superior to a drunk.
Do not under any circumstances give him the power to make you drink. Tell him flat out to stop treating you like that and that if he does it again, knowing what you are going through, you are finished with him. A sensible response would have been “Just shut up till I find a gas station and get directions.”
Email me if you want further help.