There was a group of Italian monks who tried to produce chianti, but they had to give it up. I think they never really had a chants.
My mom’s family is rife with alcoholics, but her sister actually introduced me to wine—she was my key auntie.
My family loves Ol’Granddad.
After drinking American whiskey her whole life, my mom’s a pathetic old crow.
I drank a lot of wine in Paris. Thankfully I had a designated driver, a cabbie, Rene.
I used to drink to forget, but I can’t remember why.
And I simply forget to drink.
In Portugal and Spain, I have a girl in every port—in Cadiz it’s Sherry
We gotta get off this drinking binge.
You’d think we’d feel better if we got away from dinking but there’s no proof to that.
I do get off on binge drinking.
A doctor told my aunt she could no longer touch anything alcoholic. So she got a divorce.
That joke is a hangover from an earlier time.
The difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.75, but deer nuts are under a buck.
I don’t mind if it’s raining cats and dogs as long as it doesn’t reindeer.
Reindeer are the most empathic of all creatures. They really caribou you.
As understand it, male caribou have buck teeth.
Male caribou are used to being rejected for dates by female caribou due to their buck teeth. The first ever cervid orthodontist has recently been commissioned, and they are now bracing themselves for the possibility of a first date.
Too bad the female caribou don’t like males and their elk.
Some bad things happened in the herd and they were looking for the caribous responsible—I was out of there so fast that I passed all the bucks.