Goddamn online popularity contests and flirt threads. “Who’s the best looking poster?” “Who’s the cutest poster?” “Ohhh … I wanna’ get nasty with [insert name of poster here”.
Fuck that.
I haven’t had a relationship, much less sex, in God-knows-how-long. Checking out a flirt thread or a “cutest poster” thread or something like that, do I ever see my name mentioned? Nope. Of course not. Nobody wants me … not the women on match.com who are all seeking 6’ tall guys with incomes of $50,000, with I’m only 5’ 10" and make $47K, nor the women of the SDMB. I could have a five-digit post count, and still go unmentioned in a goddamn flirt thread.
Yeah, I’m jealous. I’m also pissed off. Sick and tired of rejection, sick and tired of getting passed over, sick and tired of being ignored.
A pretty pathetic rant, I know. Probably some typos, too, since there’s always at least one in any of my posts. I suck.
If it makes you feel better, I’m 6’2" and I’m going to be single this Valentine’s Day too. I don’t make $50K either though. I think we both need to ask our bosses for a raise.
It’s funny, though…your thread about match.com inspired me to put up my own profile. It’s not linkable yet, and there’s no picture of me in it right now. But, in time, I suppose it will be ignored too.
Threads that ask people to name others do strike me as a bit divisive and not too terribly inclusive. I’ve lately been doing my best to cut back on my participation in threads like that (and hopefully have met with some success), and maybe if we all do that those threads will just go away. (That or perhaps the mods will ban them outright, especially since they take up valuable bandwidth and don’t contribute to fighting ignorance.)
:: toasts to another 20-something years of singlehood :dubious: ::
Are you being a wallflower? If you want message board attention you have to whore for it. I’m too sleepy to look into the matter but I’m pretty sure the reason most people have a swinging time on the internet is because they brag and exaggerate and even lie. Put a little spin on your image there. Five ten=a hair under 6 foot. And 47k? Think of it this way–if you wanted to you could easily embezzle an extra 3000 a year. I mean it’s ten bucks a day. You could easily steal ten dollars a day but you don’t. Why? Because you care about your community. In other words, it’s like, you make 50000 a year, but you give 3000 back to the community by not stealing it. You see? And this “haven’t had sex” business. Surely you masturbate. That is a sex act, my friend. So you’re having this great time with the being all tall, making 50000 a year and doing lots of sex acts. What the bloody hell do you have to be glum about?
Okay I’m sleepy. What I meant to say is that nobody on the whole internet thinks I’m sexy or wants to have sex with me and I am glad. Just be glad.
If it’s any consolation, I’m 25 years old, 6’2" and earn over $50K and women don’t want me either, hell I’ve been rejected by every girl I’ve every asked out - and I’ve lost count of how many that is. So don’t worry, it’s not all beer and skittles in this height and income bracket.
I guess like so many others here, I’m just getting sick of rejection, rejection, rejection in the dating arena. The most recent, a letter out of the blue after a couple of weeks of correspondence on match.com:
Pushing? Uhhh … how? I couldn’t find anything that resembled “pushing”. Then again, since I don’t really push, I’m probably seen as a passive, wimpy nice guy.
I’m just tired of being too short, too old, not athletic enough, not rich enough, and not attractive enough, when I’m 5’ 10", 170 pounds, and a relatively articulate, fun, offbeat guy with a full head of hair, more-or-less clear skin, and big blue eyes. Maybe I’ll use some of the house down payment money on getting the last ten pounds of gut sucked out in South Africa, and start lying about my age.
The flirt threads don’t help, since it reinforces that I feel ignored and unloved.
This is turning into a pity post … sorry. I’ll shut up.
Hey, as a just over six feet guy with almost no hair, I resemble that remark. And I have no problem with the ladies. It must be the extra two inches.
Seriously, if you’re having trouble meeting women then you’re just looking in the wrong places. I can’t believe that the difference between 5’10" and 6’ is even perceptible to most people, much less all that important. I’d stay away from people who are that shallow.
From what I recall, you’re intelligent and articulate. Maybe it comes across that way in person, maybe not. Have you tried something like a local meet up where you can meet people in a non-dating setting where you have something in common (versus whatever stuff people claim to be interested in on a dating service)?
I’d flirt with you but I don’t really swing that way and the local legislature would probably cast me in irons.
That would be the part that would do it for me.
I have to confess, my whole dating life, I dated guys with dark hair, who were mature. ( read a lot older than me ) Maybe you are not marketing yourself to the right crowd. What are you looking for? Are you looking for a perfect woman, or just perfect for you?
yeah okay, i’m mostly a lurker. but i really can’t stand those shameless flirt threads. they all seem so middle school.
and if it makes you feel any better, i think that even the most gorgeous, successful people feel they’re totally undate-able and worthless sometimes. maybe they’re secret is they just don’t wallow in it but keep living their lives regardless of their dating status it’s true that it always happens when you least expect it . . .
Also, although the flirt threads can be a bit juvenile, they do seem to liven up the place more than when they are totally gone, that is, make the place a bit less impersonal. There was a period when they were way too much, then a time when they seemed to go totally away. They seem to pop up near major Dopefest, etc. Even geeks need to feel loved, too, y’know. And if you don’t like them they can be ignored.
elmwood, I feel for ya. Its tough when and depressing when you feel the way you do. Your smart and I’m sure you won’t give up because good things do come to good people.
Don’t like 'em? Don’t read 'em! Someone should pit people who whine about not being mentioned in popularity threads. Big deal! I’ve been mentioned in some, not in others. Shouldn’t make you feel any worse for it. Not meaning to sound mean here, elmwood, cause I’ve got nothing against you personally, but get over it! The internet is no way a judge of how goodlooking/wonderful/smart/well liked you are (despite what hotornot.com would have you think.)
Well, this should in now way be construed as a critique of the way you feel…
But I am a middle-aged chubby man and haven’t been called cute in a long time (although a woman recently told me I have beautiful eyes.) None-the-less, I don’t have a problem popping in and telling a fellow doper that she is attractive. Everyone likes to hear it, I can’t think of how it in any way detracts from the quality of my life and maybe it brightens her day a little.
