I pit my ass [Warning: TMI]

I’m pretty sure it was “I pit my ass”, without the TMI part.

Sounds like the OP has been eating his green veggies though, good for him.

I hope you are using asswipes - regular toilet paper can be rough after awhile! :stuck_out_tongue:

You ate my whole bag of Licorice you selfish bastard!

By the way,

I found using a wireless laptop hoped me *pass *:stuck_out_tongue: the time…

Good for him…? Hell, if he was the USS Enterprise, he’d be out of Photon Torpedoes by now…!

“Captain! Its Ceramic Engineering…! We Canna Hold the Strain…!”

Heh. Heh, heh, heh.

My son learned a valuable lesson on greed and gluttony once by eating an entire pound of dried apricots in one sitting.

:eek:

A quick caution, however: if you have problems with fructose malabsorption skip the bananas and applesauce, or you may end up right back on the shitter. I speak from experience here. Substitute other gentle carb sources not containing fructose. Oh, and the caffeine in black tea can also irritate touchy digestive systems. (Also from experience, and more times on the pot.)

On the tea - yep. About 13 years ago I bit into a meatball pizza in New York City. The meatballs bit back. For a week I was running to the bathroom every 20 minutes with serious, painful cramps. I tried every dietary mod in the book including BRAT, and even tried Immodium which didn’t touch the problem. Finally went to a gastro enterologist and when I mentioned BRAT(ea) he said that the caffeine in tea could worsen the problem and he considered “T” to be “toast”.

I don’t think it aggravated my situation… hard to imagine anything making it worse short of eating an entire bottle of Ex Lax (and I have my doubts about that).

The doc did have me bring in a stool sample (and all the way to the office I was thinking “Dear Lord: I don’t want my purse stolen. But if it’s ever going to happen to me in my lifetime, today would be a great day for it…”). They cultured it. No identifiable pathogens but based on blood work they decided it was likely bacterial (and it had been happening for a week at that point) so gave me antibiotics. 24 hours later I had blessed relief.

Just curious…are there any nasty, biologic specimens in your lab? Might they be contagious? Did you wash your hands?

Here’s hoping your colonic calamity clears up quickly.

Just wanted to point out that this is unlikely to be related to the current spinach-related outbreak of E. coli diarrhea. The strain that causes outbreaks in the US is O157:H7, which is an enterohemorrhagic strain, usually causing grossly bloody diarrhea.

So it could be worse.

I thought BRAT was bananas, rice, applesauce, and toast. Not that tea doesn’t make sense, or anything.

Does now. Used to mean tea. See above.
(I learned tea as a kid and toast with my kid.)

I suggest it’d becomes BRAP= “P” standing for Probiotics. Tea can be OK, but soemtiems not. And even toast (depending on the bread used and the spreads) isn;t always the best idea.