Not the capital-V, Rome-sacking, major-league Vandals in sandals.
Just the bush-league twit or twits who did this to my car:
Happy Saint Paddy’s Day!
I can’t really muster the outrage for a traditional pitting.
But in the immortal words of Robin Williams, “Assholes do vex me!”
Whoever did this doesn’t own a car. Anyone who’s ever personally paid to repair car damage knows what waste, expense, and pain in the ass it is, and would inflict it only out of rage or calculated revenge.
I am an inoffensive neighbor. I pick up after my dogs. I don’t play loud music. My car doesn’t have any bumper stickers, vanity plates, political declarations of any kind. It blends in…except that it’s green. Well, blue-green, according to Saturn’s literature.
Was this St. Pat’s-themed vandalism? The smashing o’ the green?
Whatever. Cleaning up the broken glass in the street (I told you I was a good neighbor) and using my homeland security anti-terror plastic sheeting roll to do this:
cost me two hours of my life that I’ll never get back, and I have more time and money coming out for the permanent repairs.
Money I don’t have right now. We’re at a financial low point right now. Temporary, but very real.
Although the pissants who did this will never read this, here goes:
Some Vandals you are. You couldn’t sack groceries, let alone Rome! An elderly Italian shopkeeper with a broom would drive you like chaff before the wind. The goths would kick your tails – not the Ostrogoths or the Visigoths, but high school girls in dark eyeshadow. This car was the farthest one from the building – the easiest one to hit and flee without consequences. Real Vandals made war on the Roman Empire!
Some day when you’ve grown up, you’ll probably look back and feel a little twinge about this. Well, it’s a damn big twinge I’m feeling right now, you losers, and I never did a thing to you. I’m not The Man. I don’t even like The Man. I used the last of my bread to make a single sandwich this morning, and I don’t get paid again until Wednesday.
I hope when you grow up you meet someone like Belisarius. :mad:
Sailboat