I take my leave of you

The BBQ Pit
1

This is going to sound cryptic, because I’d rather not rehash in gross (meant doubly there) detail the events that led up to it, unless one of you is mystified or otherwise needs clarification. But … ugh. This person leaves a most foul taste in my mouth.

Those who aspire to a walk with God before and after they die should really take some sort of measures against spreading lies about those who mean(t) no ill will nor harm.

I don’t know where you got what you said, Ye Who Shall Not be Named, but I do wonder how many opportunities Jesus would have taken to lie about two of his friends, especially as the person who heard said lies has no particular relationship with either of us. You are, of course, free to believe whatever floats your Bible, but when those beliefs manifest themselves in disgusting and wholly untrue gossip you cross a line.

Neither of us is interested in redrawing that line, given the reckless abandon with which you obliterated the old one. The ball, as with the sin, is entirely in your court. And while God (assumptions about existence, for the moment, aside) is quick to forgive because He knows what the Hell you’re thinking, those others (and by this time it’s more than just us two, darling) whom you have offended may be slightly more difficult to sway.

If you were attempting to push away two godless heathens, you were, I admit, slightly successful. I am rather less enamored of you than I used to be. My fiancée, for her part, simply doesn’t care about you anymore enough to say what I am saying.

So why, at 20 past 4 inthe morning, am I saying this? Very simple: that line you crossed? Insulting her without just cause …really, insulting her at all, but furthermore for no reason at all. I can take and I can give freely, and I think I do a decent-enough job of taking. But you try to shit on the woman I love and …

I pity you, that you felt the need to say that about someone who was your friend. She is, by all accounts to which I have born witness, a true friend in the spirit and action of that phrase. You, it seems, were not. If she were hurt by this I would be rather less cordial than I am now. However, she has said her peace elsewhere, and so I end mine.

2

Oh, punha, I am so sorry. In my book, you and B are fine people, and I don’t care who, what or if you worship. I am especially sorry this was done to you in the name of Christ. :frowning:
For what it’s worth, I share some of your anger.

Take care,
CJ

3

Well, phooey.

4

Some “friends” will do that.

Sorry that it happened to you.

5

It’s really a bizzar (bizarr? bizzaarr?) thing. I really don’t know why after two+ years she’d do something like this. I know our last conversation wasn’t entirely great but I wasn’t upset or mad with her at the time. It was just really confused and slightly concerned. She had gotten married to a guy she met online (which in itself isn’t all that bad obviously;)) but she had never met him before and she was already engaged to someone else who I thought she wanted to marry. So colour me confuzzled when she breaks the news. I wasn’t unhappy for her, just a bit concerned (she’d had a string of rash decisions recently).

So the best we can figure is maybe she felt attacked (because I wasn’t jumping up and down for joy) during our last conversation and decided to lash out at me. shrug

I’m hurt by her actions and before I wanted to talk to her about it but now I’ve just decided it’s not worth the effort. I won’t give her any harsh words to fuel her martyr fire. I hope she does find peace with God and that she really does learn what it is to be a Christian (and I’m fairly convinced it doesn’t involve lying about your friends).

sigh :frowning:

6

((((Punha And Fizz))))

Nil illegitemi carborundum.

7

Why do friends betray like this? :frowning:

Aw, shucks, from reading of you online I know you are both great people. It doesn’t help the feeling of betrayel and confusion of course…

8

What they said, Pun and Fizzes. This truly craps. B, if you can find it in yourself, I think your analysis is probably pretty close to on target, and you might consider going back and making clear that your actions were motivated out of concern that she not act rashly on such a big decision, not out of (hypocritical) judgment of her. And then see if things can be mended. But if you’re as injured as I have a feeling you might be by this whole thing, there’s no fault adhering to your unwillingness or emotional inability to do that.

In any case {{{{{{{Fizzes}}}}}}} and {{{{Pun}}}}

9

Hrm. Well, Puhna, hrm. I dunno what happened but I’m sorry that it did and that you are feeling the way you are. My best to you.

Tibs.

10

And big hugs to you, Fizz - I wish you the best.

11

I hope this works itself out ok. It sucks when someone you thought was a friend “bites” you. ((punha)) ((fizzles))

12

Sorry this all happened, you guys. I’d like to give kudos for the cleanest flame I have ever read.

Fizz: Bizarre.

13

Jeez, pun, when I saw the thread title, I thought you were taking your leave of us. I’m relieved that that’s not the case.

fizzes, sorry about what your (former) friend did. That’s pretty disgusting.

Yup, that’s the implication I’ve always drawn from ‘engaged’.

I would’ve been too.

14

Thanks for the support, y’all:) I wish I did understand this person’s actions. There’s a good bit that I didn’t go into in the OP, such as the fact that this girl, before she married Crazy Internet Guy 2 (I am the first, of course;)), was going on about how evil her mother was for not letting her wear the ring of the guy in Guam. Then when she met CIG2, mother wasn’t evil and there had never been a ring and … uck. Among other things, I’m glad to be rid of her circle of “Well now that this new love of my life is here, everyone else was abusive and not right for me.” Reminds me of someone else I knew for too long and am glad not to have any contact with.

RT, not gonna happen for a while. For one, I’m SO CLOSE to 10K posts:D For another, just where do you think I would go to run through threads naked? Hmm?

I thought so;)

15

punha, after all the fun we’ve been having for the last few days and now you have to endure something so sucky as this. Betrayal is never acceptable. Not even when done in the name of God (perhaps least so). Let me know how best to support you and revive your flagging spirits. I am at your service.

PS: You can streak my threads any time!

16

I thought about going and talking to her when I first learned what she had done but the more I think about it the more I’d just rather not bother with it. She had chances to talk to me after our last conversation that she didn’t take so she can hardly say that I was ignoring her or (as she did say) that I was forbidden to talk to her. This is just the last in a long line of grievances that I and others have had with her and the first time she’s ever done anything to me personally. It was never anything serious, just enough to make the friendship tiring after awhile.

So I dunno. If she wants to talk to me she can, I won’t shun her but I just don’t have the energy for her anymore. What I thought was a close friendship was not so I’ll let it go.

Thanks everybody for your support. It’s never fun or easy to lose a friend even if they turn out to be no good sort of friend at all.

17

I appreciate the thought, my friend, but … it’s strange. I’d normally be extraordinarily pissed off at someone who did what this girl did. I just stopped feeling close to her when she rejected me a month or two ago (the reason was basically that I asked her about her faith and said I disagreed with her on several things). Oh, and that whole going to hell thing, too (though to be fair, I’ve grown rather accustomed to people thinking that). This past event (the gossipy one) actually happened about a week ago, so I don’t have this to add to my most recent life events. At the time, B and my reaction to it was basically “Huh? We said what? I did what? Where did she get that from?” It’s only after allowing it to fester (something I seem to be good at doing with anything that happens…) that I am beginning to be rather irked at her (though again, not going to flame her as such. I do hope she realizes the totality of what she has lost, though).

FWIW, the past week or so’s events in MPSIMS and Pit (re: SSA) really didn’t bother me a lot. People suck, and if you can pick that out from the start it’s a lot easier to deal with them being icky. It’s the ones who don’t manifest it until later that piss me off. And I’m (surprisingly, for me) more angry at her for the notion that I’d forbid B from talking to anyone than much of anything else. It’s not true, and it’s obvious to anyone who knows either of us that it’s utterly preposterous.

::deep breath::

Anyway. I may yet email this girl and see what’s up, but at this point it’s not worth the aggravation. Plus I have better things to do with my time (less than 300 away from post 10K now:))

18

Dear 'Punah and Fizzes, I’m really sorry to hear you got burned this way. Hopefully, this “friend” will realize the error of her ways and make amends. Or perhaps not. Eitherway, I’m sorry that you got burnt like this.

*{{{{{big group hug}}}}}]/i]

19

I’m really sorry this happened to you both. Not sure I have anything more to add, but betrayal especially stings when it si “done in the name of God.” Rather hypocritical, I find.

{{{{iampunha & fizzestothetop}}}}

F_X

20

Glad you can let it roll off your back, iampunha, and that you’re sticking around. (I too was misled by the thread title.)