Considering I just finished Echo in the Bone, this one might actually work on me. 
takes copious amounts of notes
There’s some good stuff in here! I’m seriously tempted to just wander around the town over the coming weekend trying these out just to see the reactions. And besides, if a girl can resist my smile, no pick-up line was ever going to win her over. (See, don’t you love that smile?)
No. I don’t really think a pulse is all that important to this guy.
Of course! I usually follow it up with something like, “Thanks for telling me I’d be pretty if only I looked different.” They always immediately start with the, “No no, you’re pretty now, but what I was trying to say was…” Yeah, yeah, yeah, stop talking to me.
I have to admit, I like the luggage one. Too bad I’m not single enough to try it.
I am of the opposite opinion in most cases.
Ditto – who else immediately flashed to JAMIE IN A KILT!!!
There was the dude who sat down beside me on a bench and said, “You have beautiful feet. Can I touch them?” Not only did I not let him touch them, I considered never going out of the house in sandals again.
So which SCA event did you go to?
Back in my single days I had an apartment next door to the bar. (yes, it was sweeet.) One night I was going home and the usual big crowd of people were outside the bar.
Some total stranger guy: “Hi, how are you?”
Me: “Fine.”
Him: “What are you doing?”
Me: “Going home.”
Him: “Want some company?”
Me: “No.”
Him: “Well do you want to come over to my place then?”
Me: “No. I have to work in the morning.”
Him: “I have an alarm clock.”
Me: (goes inside and double-locks the door.)
I actually got that “alarm clock” line a few times back in the day. :rolls eyes:
One I’ve never tried but I’m dying to: If you see her in a supermarket, pick something off of the shelf and ask “Hey, do you know how to cook this?” It works best if what you’ve picked up is a bottle of shampoo.
I got a big laugh out of that tdn — especially remembering that the last thing someone said to me in the grocery was a little old lady wanting to know where the canned milk was.
“It’s right behind you!” I said.
“I knew I’d asked the right person!” she beamed.
Maybe you had to be there.
Anyway, I was once told that looking at me made him growl. “Grrrrrrrrr!” he demonstrated, in my ear. Sheesh! I like to talk to people, not make guttural noises until we fall in the sack!
Well, maybe with my husband, but that’s different.
You had me at “big tall Scottish guy wearing a kilt.”
Thanks. I wish I could take credit for it.
I’ve told women in the cereal aisle that they’re looking at the wrong kinds of cereal if they want the really good prizes. That usually gets a smile.
“Ah, you can always tell the health nuts” can work if the woman’s shopping basket is filled with candy, Hostess pastries, and frozen dinners. It can be especially fun at this time of year when people are stocking up for Halloween.
This sounds like it has a very large potential to backfire and come across as you being awfully insulting. Best to make sure your cart is filled with a bunch of junk food also. Extra points if you actually are going to eat that junk food and aren’t just using it as an ice breaker.
I did something very close to that in an Indian shop when I was much younger and had them laughing themselves silly. I’d selected a bottle of jasmine oil that I thought might make for some interesting cooking (in the manner jasmine tea) and got carefully explained to that it is what Indian women use to make their hair glossy.
I’d never use that on someone who isn’t in excellent shape. I’d also make sure she knows I’m joking. And it helps if it’s something seasonal.
I said it to a cute blonde yesterday who had a bag of candy corn in her basket. She claimed she was only going to use it to decorate.
And yeah, I had a couple of frozen dinners in my basket.
Eww, there’s a hair in my tea!
I actually think that’s pretty funny. That’s the kind of shit I would say if I were the kind of guy douchey enough to keep asking a girl to come home with me after she’s told me no. That reminds me of a funny story. No wait, the story isn’t funny at all. There was some guy at the bar Sunday who [del]pestered[/del] flirted with me rather aggressively, and asked me to come home with him about five different times. At one point I even said, “I’m not sure why you think my answer is going to change.” I ended up just closing my tab and leaving.
If someone said this to me, I’d probably just shoot him a dirty look then walk away. Then again I am mean and old, and have lost much of my patience for pick up lines.
Edit: I should really compile a list of the stuff people say to me. Some of it is funny, but it’s usually insipid and annoying.
The beauty of that kind of line is that it’s self-selecting. I can weed out the mean old ladies right away.
Even if they are only 26.
EDIT: Or 28. I forget what MOL said her age was.