intimidated by beauty

Okay, gang, I’m asking for help.

The other day I was on the bus and sitting across from me was a gorgeous lady. The prettiest woman I’ve seen in a long, long time.

I smiled at her. She smiled back. I go brain dead.

I wanted to say something to her. But I knew that if I opened my mouth, the only thing that I would blubber out was:
“You’re the prettiest woman I’ve seen in a long, long time.”

So I said nothing.

We went our separate ways.

Now, I’m no Brad Pitt. But I’m not the Elephant Man, either.
Why do I freeze up like that?

And do you have any suggestions?

Both male and female responses, please.


Just stare (especially at the boobies) and drool. Women looooooove that.

What’s wrong with saying that? It’s sweet and honest.

Eh, I think the “in a long, long time” is a little creepy (IMHO), especially on the bus where the person saying it might follow you off at your stop. (That’s how my brain works anyway)

I don’t know what advice to give you- I smile at people all the time, and they rarely strike up conversation. (Maybe I’m ugly as a hatful of assholes, though). A nice ice breaker might be “How ‘bout this weather? Hot/cold enough for ya’?” or “I’m not trying to pick you up or anything, but I wanted you to know that you have a beautiful smile. It really made my day” (Someone said that to me once- a bell ringer for the Salvation Army. It gave me the warm fuzzies)


Yah, but if you’re crusty and deranged like me, you’ll get annoyed.

Personally, I would suggest “Hi there.”

Really - you can gauge her response - if she gives you a big smile and says hi there back then strike up a conversation. If not, well, you haven’t really wasted anything.

Come on - you can do it - you certainly don’t strike ME as the shy type. :wink:

I think you’re a hottie, TN*Hippie, and I’ve never met you, so letting her see your personality seems like a safe bet to me.

“Hi” is the easiest and safest route, I think. You can certainly compliment her, but be more specific than “You’re the prettiest woman I’ve seen in a long, long time.” Try something like “I like your shoes” or “You have lovely hair.” A guy I don’t know walked by me the other day and said, “Nice hair”, and it made my day.

Just picture her trying to pinch off a huge dump. That would bring her down to earth in my mind. She’s just a person.

i would not have run away lol. what a nice thing to say

If you want to get across the idea that you think she’s undeniably, extraordinarily attractive, you see her, say, “…Wow.”, catch yourself, look away all embarrassed and mutter, “Excuse me.” Then don’t make eye contact with her again. Pretend to be interested in the passing scenery, or admire your shoes. Your face should express astonishment, shyness, and misery. Leave her alone. Then it’s up to her to make the next move.

Or…you could offer to read her some of your haiku. snork

O pretty woman
You are easy on the eyes
Do you like weather?

thanks All,

Don’t ask me. I just have to be across the street from a woman and she’ll run screaming.


Well I just have to say that that little gem has brightened up my day. And I’m not even a woman.

As for the whole talking-to-pretty-women thing, I can’t do it either. I think this is because I’m scared that I’m going to come across as some sort of deranged stalker type.

I should really look at it from a “What’s the worst that can happen” point of view unfortunatly my imagination can come up with some pretty bad worst-case scenarios.

Hell, just smile and say “Hi”.


( Who should probably take his own advice once in a while )

“Where ya heading?” is also a good one or “Where ya off to?” She’ll say something like home, work, shopping and boom there’s your conversation with a nice neutral question. And with a little more legroom then the weather ones.

Or if you’re really lucky a bus weirdo will come along and maybe yell at the bus driver, the people on the bu or the world in general. Those people are a good conversation starter.

Usually, it doesn’t matter how pretty someone is, I can talk to them. One time, however, this absolutely incredible woman walked into the lab where I worked at college. (She was an undergrad…likely a freshman, but looked older) I answered her questions, but was completely terrified. And I had a girlfriend at the time, so I wasn’t even looking to do anything. She was the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in my entire life…including on screen. I sat there for about 5 minutes after she left thinking to myself “Oh…my…God.” It’s the only time I can remember being truly intimidated by a woman’s good looks.

When someone stares or honks at me or tells me how great-looking I am (although this hasn’t happened in a while!), I really really like it. But this doesn’t mean I’m going to respond to a conversational gambit which focuses on my looks. I pretend to ignore the honk or just say “Thank you” to a comment and go about my merry way.

Now, if someone starts up a conversation based on something other than my looks, I am much more likely to respond. Gorgeous women don’t need you staring at them or trying to start a conversation by telling them how gorgeous they are; they already know. And that’s a dead-end conversation: “You’re gorgeous.” “Thank you. Goodbye.” Ask her if she knows of a good coffee shop or restaurant in town. Ask her if she knows of a good park to take your dog to. Ask her if she knows anywhere that has really good bread/steak/produce. Once you start talking to her I think the intimidation factor will be reduced (unless she’s a real bitch who then didn’t deserve your attention in the first place).

This really happens?
So all the times that someone says that must have been the case, they were not necessarily lying through their teeth?

never knew.

“Do you like weather?”

Let’s make better use of this.
First ask if you can “tickle her ass with a feather.”
If she says “yes”, then you’re in.
If she looks at you shocked, say
“I said, isn’t this particularly nasty weather?”

worst advice ever. be proactive, you can’t sit around waiting for life to hand you the cherries.