Well, I’m not close to solving it, though I’ve at least figured out why there are colons. You sneaky person. 
Julie
question: where did Napoleon keep his armies?
answer: in his sleevies
Julie
Dang it, I’m not going to let this thread get the best of me! Callahan/Tom/Jake (who’s tending this place?): a shot of Bushmill’s please.
** Toes up to the fireplace **
Notices a sound; duo; deceased queues;
** takes a drink **
Flower month; sun’s time; piercing tool, routes; castle; joke going overhead; went around another driver; having, eject (with toss); scam, ill, time question, female sib.
** Sends glass into fireplace ** KAPOW! **
And since my toast isn’t likely to come true, back to work…
Here’s to deadlines.
May day always keep whooshing past without consequences?
Am I close?
Julie
Yep, that’s it, except that I tried using “day” as a phonetic equivalent of “they”.
Bah, maybe I’ll just stick with the drinking. I’m better at that than puzzles, anyway.
Another shot, would you barkeep?
Oooo…I think you’ve got it, jsgoddess.
Hey, hey! I have returned, ladies and gentlemen!
"She graces the crossroads of primal action and pervasive entropy." —Ian Nottingham, The Witchblade
Serving up a few more. They are unrelated within a theme, if that makes any sense.
black bird, Chinese surname; parent of a ligon; concealed from view; word describing women’s clothing on a man, not under.
melting; month after April, ___ are for kids you silly rabbit!
last name of Adrian, plural; opposite of sisters
There you go, everybody. Ought to last you awhile! And welcome, newcomers! I’m still working this out myself!
I never rust. I only rustle.
ching!
So. yawns and stretches any such thing as a shotta caffeine in this place?
black bird, Chinese surname; parent of a ligon; concealed from view; word describing women’s clothing on a man, not under = Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.
melting; month after April, ___ are for kids you silly rabbit! = The Matrix.
last name of Adrian, plural; opposite of sisters = Blues Brothers.
I thought you said there was no theme. 
slides a shot of Bushmill’s to sciguy and pours an Irish coffee for Aspidistra
There ya go, folks.
Aaah.
Awake now…
Cheers!
Here’s a set on a slightly different theme:
Tab;queer,many infinities sideways
Windless side, monster lake; hill, many savannahs
Not Adam’s partner; many complainers to God
Get one, you’ll get 'em all…
Bill Gates
Linus Torvalds
Lilith something?
Oh. Steve Jobs.
Julie
Bill Gates
Linus Torvalds
Lilith something?
Oh. Steve Jobs.
Julie
Bill Gates
Linus Torvalds
Lilith something?
Oh. Steve Jobs.
Julie
Nicely done, jsgoddess! So, what’s yer pleasure, ma’am?
- Bows to the goddess of puzzle-solving *
Gimme a Coca Cola and an amaretto sour.
I’ll need a few of those before I get wound up enough to lob things in the general direction of the fireplace!
split apart or stick together, 45 inches, use it to form a bond; Harrison’s role, France is a member, the sound of a leak
Niue online; long ago, strike out; tug, ways in
razor brand, say it with your mouth open, vamoose; not yet a Boy, sulfur
nick for Schlafly, uncertain word, where the farmer is, pay up front, German agreement; young equines
young Roger Moore; stead, to be for he; jokester, at home, owners of diners
a kind of leader; Ms. Rice, hair goop, you and me; evade, these make us human
Julie
Good grief. Sorry about the triple post up there!
Julie
Mixes up a Coca Cola and an amaretto sour and slides it across the bar to jsgoddess
Here ya go. Don’t keep us waiting for your debut toast too long, now. 