This is the reason my ex had for breaking up with me four months ago, but it wasn’t the reason he gave when he did it.
HOW HE DID IT: He waited until I was out of town for a week on a business trip, then didn’t call, contact or otherwise endeavor to see me when I got back. When he wouldn’t answer or return my phone calls, I finally sent him an email saying “What gives?”
His response was a huge cop-out; “I’m really busy, blah blah blah, no time for any of my friends, blah blah blah, don’t have the wherewithal to be in a relationship, blah blah blah.”
I just had dinner with him on Friday, and it came out that he wasn’t as crazy about me as he thought, he didn’t see a future for us. I basically agreed with him, and admitted that he had seen the impending demise earlier than I.
HOW I WISH HE HAD DONE IT: First of all, I wish he had not said all of the things he had said in our relationship if he didn’t really mean them. “We’re going to be together forever!”, “You are SOO my girlfriend!”, “I love you so much” (said the night before I left on my business trip). Then I wish he had just told me the truth. It would have hurt, but anything he did would have hurt, and I would have been able to get closure sooner, rather than having four months of “what the hell happened?”.
So my advice? Tell her the truth, it won’t hurt her any more or any less than anything else you do. Just stop pretending and perpetuating a lie.