:smack:
Bathroom?
Dude you are old. The new rage is doing it handicapped parking spaces.
If I were him, and had any idea how much you were overanalyzing what seems to be a pretty casual interaction, I would run far, far away. Get over it, seriously.
I’m old, too. Do you need a placard?
I found since cell phones and texting became popular people tend not to make definite plans anymore. They play it by ear, afraid to commit because something better might come along.
It doesn’t sound, from what you’ve presented, that he’s really blowing you off. You really didn’t have definite plans and he got comfy while napping and decided to stay in. I wouldn’t read any more into it than that and wouldn’t dwell on it.
What it does sound like is that you’re not in a relationship, you’re casually dating, which is fine. It’s just different from being in a committed longtime relationship, which is what you’re used to. You aren’t engaged to this guy, or even committed in any way.
He didn’t feel like going out so he didn’t. He never said he would, he didn’t lie, he let you know what he was doing, so I don’t see where he “blew you off”. If you’d made a specific definite date and he hadn’t showed up or called or texted, that would be blowing you off. He didn’t do anything wrong.
You and me both. I remember when boys and girls used to speak in full sentences (and still had miscommunications).
Hell no, just get a good dolly… and hurry!
A blow-up dolly?
Here is what happened:
He was a little interested, so he asked you out in order to get to know you. Obviously it’s smart to make a good impression with someone new, and he did it up right. During the second date, he decided that you weren’t for him (the broken engagement is a HUGE red flag. Here is no way you don’t have baggage), so he made a faux rendezvous (“Yeah, we should get together one day…”) and bowed out.
Then one night he was drunk, didn’t find anyone at the bar, and was wanting some action. Your number was fresh on his phone, and he figured it would’t hurt to try you. If he wasn’t planning to see you again, he wouldn’t lose anything by offending you.
You went. This taught him that you are willing to take his scraps, and that he does not need to treat you well. You let him set the bar as low as possible. Then, you lead him on. Everyone knows what a one AM housecall means. There was no way at that point that you could be demonstrating self-respect by holding back. You just frusterated him.
So the weekend comes up, and he figures it might be worth having you waiting if he got horny and had nobody better to sleep with. So he texts to see if you’re willing to be on call that night. You indicate you will, but in a hot-and-cold way. He probably figured it was not worth the bullshit for a booty call that might not even put out- might as well just catch up on sleep. At least that is a sure thing.
Learn and move on. Keep dating, but you’ll probably have to keep it casual until the breakup is not fresh on your mind. Guys don’t want that baggage, and you need to demonstrate it’s not an issue, and only time will pove that. If you don’t want to be a booty call, don’t accept a booty call. Men will try to find the lowest standard that you will accept. Once you accept it, it’s hard to reverse. AND by accepting low standards you make the chase boring ad he loses interest and respect.
Men ask women they want to have relationships with on dates. It’s not too much to ask.
Anyway, in every game you are going to strike out now and then. A guy who isn’t enchanted by you isn’t worth getting upset about losing. And don’t take it personally. You just don’t happen to be what he needs at this time. Think about all the guys who aren’t what you need right now- there is nothing wrong with them, they just arn’t for you. It happes.
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I wouldn’t run over to a guy’s place at 1am for any reason short of a medical emergency. It sends the wrong message.
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Take his texts at face value until you have evidence to the contrary. He may have been napping. Not a big deal.
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Don’t play games. Don’t play hard to get. Treat him like you’d like to be treated.
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If you’re unsure about his intentions, back off and let him take the lead for a bit.
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I agree that you’re still in the rebound stage and should probably not pursue anything for awhile.
Good luck.
Only if you don’t want to risk towing while you’re still going at it! :eek:
I tried that but Jame Mc Gary suddenly barged in, in total cockblocker mode, and asked me if I didnt feel any shame for what I was doing.
I just couldnt look him in the eyes.
This.
What ever happened with calling him up on the phone, and speaking directly to him?
URZ OLd. LoLz
So u guys think he had no serious interest even before he made the booty text? I’d have to agree. If u think about it…
First date = he suggested getting drinks sometime. then we talk on phone (one of the only 2 times he ever picked up) and i say, “what about tomorrow night?” he says “may not work but call me tomorrow anyhow – the worst that can happen is I say no!” (Notice, he never says he will let ME know or call ME.) I call him back and he blows off the call for the next 2 days – no return call or text. I finally text him again to ask for the date again and then he accepts.
even after our 2nd meetup (the group get-together), where he was all romantic & kissed me, at the end of the night i suggested going to the hiking trails sometime soon… and he brushed that off & just said “I’ll let u know about next week’s cookout.” So… 1) He never initiated any further plans w/me alone & 2) he leaves me on standby about the cookout. If u really like a girl & have a whole weekend off, then won’t you want to “book” her for a certain night in advance?
Then I hear from him only 1 text msg the whole week – another vague “still don’t know when the cookout is yet.” The cookout thing was probably just baiting me so that when he booty-called, it wouldn’t look so out-of-the blue.
One thing is for sure about this situation, your ex-fiancee sure dodged a crazy bullet.
Seriously, listen to even sven on this one. I think she’s got her finger on it.
yes im pretty sure she’s right.
the only part that doesn’t make sense = the texts yesterday. no need to volunteer info about what you’re up to, ask me what i’m doing, then follow up and explain that u fell asleep and napped for a long time. as a man who doesn’t want a woman either now or at any point in the future, wouldn’t you do better if u just blew her off completely… Or sent the 1 text in the morning asking y i called, then ignored me from there out?