Organ donation is switching to opt-out in the UK
How to Get Vegan Blood
Northerners who moved south.
What Are Your Favorite Purebred Breeds of Dogs?
I like Treeing Walker Coonhounds, but I can’t find anyone to give mine a poodle clip. 
How does the blue tick in twitter work?
Peanut allergy
The tick wouldn’t be blue if you didn’t eat so many peanuts around it!
** What makes a joke racist?
Asian Takeout Mustard: what is in?**
Good thing you didn’t use the word “yellow.”
Are dogs and other animals fooled by Impossible and Beyond Meat burgers?
How does the blue tick in twitter work?
It makes the Impossible burger submit paperwork to prove it’s a real burger. It’s the only animal that isn’t fooled.
** What the women in your harem should wear this season
Denver - As Sexist as Ever**
The city fathers are definitely getting out of hand.
** Organ donation is switching to opt-out in the UK
How to Get Vegan Blood**
- Declare vegan blood an organ
- ???
- Profit!
** Are you the universe?
Who has traveled the furthest from the place of their birth? Who has stayed the closest?**
I’ve both traveled the furthest and stayed the closest, because I am the universe.
I’ve seen fire and I’ve seen…
"Stealth" type van living
Must not have been very stealthy.
** Insanity or dementia? Or can it be both?
Mass Killings in the United States 2019**
Hey, any defense will sometimes work
** Elegy for the minstrel show
post Sylvester Stallone’s early movie career
What makes a joke racist?**
I don’t think Stallone was ever in a minstrel show.
Why did the French implement decimal time during the French Revolution?
Slow Internet Connection
They could only download stuff 10/12th as fast as everyone else.
** Broke my nose yesterday. What questions do I need to ask the ENT?
Is UV Window Film Worthwhile?**
No, but here’s a scrip for Preparation H, if that helps.
** America opens the Borders. Then what?
Savage beating**
Don’t say we didn’t warn you. MAGA!
Dealing with unpleasant, untrue rumors
Buying toothpast used to be so simple…
Well, if you’re not snorting Colgate, what’s all that white stuff around your nose?
** How much freedom does a DA have NOT to prosecute? (sexually explicit)
What happens if they testify anyway?
**
Anyone want to play hide-&-seek?
Kansas City Dopefest
Kansas City, Kansas City here I come.
They got some crazy hide-&seek Dopefests there
And I’m gonna get me one.
**Pulled a Woman out of a car yesterday.
Should we get a budgie?
**
I don’t know – a woman AND a budgie?
You have to decide which one you really want to keep.
Couple spends $100,000 after bank error
A plea for help - the price of a leg is $1500
Do they really need more than 66 2/3 legs?
** Is The Far Side Returning?
Inconceivable!**
Gary Larson can conceive of it (and "Inconceivable~ is going to be in a lot of sequential thread posts)