Don’t count your weasels before they pop.
A fool and his money are some party.
When life gives you lemons, shut up and eat your damn lemons.
Chiggers can’t be boozers.
He’s not the sharpest spoon in the drawer.
Work, the curse of the drinking class.
Absence makes the heart go yonder.
You’ve made my day, now you have to sleep in it.
That’s just closing the elevator doors after the horse has flown the coop!
You’ll always find a lost item in the last of the Mohicans.
It just goes in one ear and down the drain.
I was just trying to help you get to ten pages. 
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read, so I’d just watch television.
Some might have said this thread was done beyond the question of a doubt. Some might even say that to continue would be beating the thread with a dead stick. And ninety-nine times out of ten, you’d be right. But Jean Gnome read the handwriting on the wind, and bravely stepped up to the plate to pick up the gauntlet.
So if you have a mixed metaphor, go ahead. Spew it off your chest. Keeping it to yourself kinda defeats the whole point.
Myself, I’m bone empty.