It’s not a pun, he called the former Simon exactly what “rock” or rather “stone” meant in Greek, “Petros”. Peter is just the Western adaption of the Greek name. At least that’s what we can get from the gospels that were written in Greek. What Jesus called Simon/Peter in Aramaic, I have no idea.
Father, Son, Holy Spirit…OK, it’s tracking so far.
Rule 34.
Moderating:
Joking about child porn involving Jesus is kinda being a jerk here. Knock it off.
“Jesus is sitting on your couch, what do you do.” is a great thread idea, you guys can start that one.
My thread is making a tour of SDMD, and it is doing nothing for our focus.
“You baked an Apple Pie and that was viewed as a contentious act by some so for thousands of years people have been killing each other over it. Was baking that Apple Pie worth it?”
I’d imagine he’d stare at you blankly. That’s what I’d do.
It may not be hell, but Pauly Shore is sure to be there.
That is one of the funniest things I have ever seen!
I would ask him to read the comments on that video, but I hear he’s already visited hell.
I’d ask him what is opinion on gay people is, since he’s never previously had anything to say about that.
He’d try to sell you a copy of Watch Tower.
I suspect Jesus would be more like Gilbert Gottfried. Not sure how much of that I could take.
Jesus and Moses are chatting heaven, discussing miracles and drinking some of Jeremiah’s wine.
After a bit, they decide to recreate their favorite miracle.
First, they go to the Red Sea. Moses raises his staff to heaven, concentrates and prays, and the waters part.
Next they go to the Sea of Galilee and rent a boat. They sail out, Jesus hops over the side to walk on the water, and immediately sinks out of sight. Moses quickly parts the waters again, and asks Jesus what happened?
“Forgot about the holes.”
I’d be OK with Gilbert being Jesus, so long as he managed to incorporate his Aristocrats joke into his sermons.
If he was the messiah, the Aristocrats would be doctrine. And we would all look fondly back on our childhood days.
John staggers to his feet and wipes various fluids and solids from his face. “Well, what do you think?”
“What do you guys call yourselves?” The talent agent asks.
All call out in unison, “The Apostles!”
Oh, you’re definately going to Hell for that!
Yeah, well, they are going to need a new donkey.
Mary Magdalene will need a good rest, too.
What, exactly, did Salomé do with the head of John the Baptist? Is it something we are better off not knowing/imagining?