While I’m sorry for your troubles, Saint Cad, I don’t see this ending well.
QFT. However … teenagers have no taste anyway so let them eat wtf they want. Dont take it personally.
You know who else liked ketchup and cottage cheese?
Richard M. Nixon.
Especially 23-year-old teenagers.
I don’t mind that my 12 year old does not like what I cook and I would not object to her putting ketchup on it if that would get her to at least friggin’ taste the damn veggies. If she does not want what I cook she can, and does, prepare something for herself.
When the older kids are home/in town? They might make themselves something or if we are eating as a family in some combination they will often help cook or sometimes make a meal. Of course if what I made was a fail they will be honest about that and if they need to use a bunch of hot sauce or ketchup for a fail, so be it.
A 23 year old living in the house who is not sharing in the cooking has not been raised right. My wife knew how to cook; she just married someone who enjoys it so she does not cook much, has not cooked much, for a couple of decades. But she can do it. My adult kids went off into the world knowing how to cook and to experiment in the kitchen.
This adult child expects you to cook for him when he comes home late and your wife expects you to as well? Yanks your chain if you don’t? Whoa.
Family meeting time. The adult child needs to pull his weight in the household, you are not the family slave, and he needs the life skill of food preparation. Your offer is to teach him how to cook (and do that teaching right, not half-assed) and then let him sometimes cook for the rest of you or just you … try to gag it down without too much ketchup! And if he unwilling to learn then he is on his own.
If you can’t do that because that means conflict with your wife and you cave to that, then yeah, this is a bigger problem than a brat of a man-child. If the relationship cannot stand up to your standing up to her getting on your shit, or you don’t have enough spine to do that, then y’all got some serious work to do.
What is wrong with you?! Why would you describe an image like that outside of a spoiler?!
That was wrong. Just wrong.
Spoken like the voice of true entitlement.
Novice! I knew a bloke who put it on ice cream. Yes, everyone thought he was insane.
How odd.
Okay, wait, to make sure of what I’m missing: in what ways is the stepson “showing disrespect” to the OP’s cooking besides putting ketchup on it?
One illustration of why I was considering posting “chefs” in the IMHO thread about which professions have the most assholes.
You’re a good dude Saint Cad, and taking a pretty good beating here. I do hope things work out at home.
Saint Cad you had said it did not go well and that he is there partly to learn how to be an adult.
What part of an adult being able to cook for ones self is a life skill, that adults do not get catered to, and an adult member of a household must pull their fair share of the weight does your wife object to?
If he is to be learning to be an adult your placing yourself as doormat is not a very good role model.
Look, you’ve tried getting the kid to change his behavior. That didn’t work, and you can’t force the issue due to your wife. Okay. So your remaining options all involve your own behavior. You can:
a: Let the situation continue as it is. Stew in frustration every time you find yourself cooking food for this person you view as an ungrateful leech. Allow resentment to fester in your gut. Experience the daily relationship fallout from behaving this way around the rest of your family.
b: Decide that the ketchup thing isn’t really a big deal and stop letting it bother you. It’s just ketchup. Not everyone is a gourmand. He obviously appreciates your cooking if he complains when you don’t do it “right.”
c: Stop cooking for the kid, period. Nobody can make you do this. This is a boundary you can reasonably set. You can decide you are not cooking for him at all; or you can decide that you will cook for him only within very specific boundaries, e.g. “I will make enough dinner for three people and I will save yours in the fridge if you aren’t home, but if you choose not to eat it, it’s my lunch the next day.” Or, “I will only cook for you when you are actually home to eat.” Or whatever. Pick something that causes you the least amount of frustration and anger.
There is a parenting anecdote that I have told to several friends. I read it in some parenting book back in the day when my kids were toddlers. It’s really targeted at toddler parents, but you seem to be experiencing some similarities with that, so I’ll share it here too:
A mother brings her toddler in for the well-baby checkup. The doctor asks how the baby is eating. She throws her hands up in the air and says, “She’s impossible! Every mealtime is a disaster. We struggle and struggle to get her to eat, but she will only eat food that is absolutely doused with cinnamon. It’s the only thing she likes! How can we stop having this battle constantly?”
Another mother brings her toddler in. Same age. The doctor asks how the baby is eating. She says, “Oh, she’s wonderful, no problem at all. She’ll eat anything in the world, just as long as we sprinkle it with cinnamon first.”
The point being, you decide what battles you’re going to fight.
I will! 
I’ve never understood the whole “what, you put ketchup on hot dogs??” bit. I mean, this is not filet mignon we’re pouring ketchup on.
This is a hot dog we’re ‘desecrating’ - a thing made up of all the leftover bits of the assorted animals that contribute those bits. ISTM that whatever one can do to make those leftover bits more appetizing to you is well within reason. If making a relish of Brussels sprouts (ecch!) and putting it on your hot dog is what does it for you, then good for you.
Indeed - a hot dog is a vehicle for all the condiments you can get to stay in the bun, in my opinion.
“Eww, you can still taste the hog anus.” - Homer Simpson
I see what you did there.
Well, to be fair, he was talking about a Chicago hot dog which is usually the leftover bits of assorted cows.
Cook stews in a crock pot or casseroles or something simple for the family (if you want to). Then go find some foodie friends who’ll cater to your every whim and desire with regards as to how to properly eat your food.
I’ve never understood why people get so upset about ketchup. I don’t care for ketchup myself, but it’s got sugar and vinegar. Of course there are going to be people out there who love it to death.
My SO is from Chicago and about has heart failure when I put ketchup on a hot dog. Until I met him, I had no idea there were hot dog snobs.
Yep. Love the stuff. My second favorite snack (just behind Korea’s choco-roll) is rice with kojujang, cheese, and ketchup. Great stuff. And just because I like that doesn’t mean I have no idea of “good food” or that my palate is somehow unsophisticated. I simply like the flavor mix. I like other flavor mixes, too.