Just punchlines

Oh, but madam, we’ve already established what you are. I was just now negotiating a price.

…and then just lead into the day’s top story.

So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.

'If that other engine goes, we’ll be up here all day".

If you’d checked the walk-in freezer, we’d both still be alive.

Beginning to lose his temper, Picard shouted at the Pfaff dealer, “Do you have any idea how many torn uniforms we have to mend? I don’t care how you get this thing working, make it sew!

They both circle Uranus wiping out Klingons.

“Nonsense. I put my $3000 check in, and took my change out.”

“Me, too, I didn’t know we had a choice.”

“I don’t know who he is, but he’s got the Pope as his chauffeur!”

but these are the only feet I have

She tried to read the waffle iron.

“Who’s that guy up there next to Fred?”

Christopher Walken.

“In fact, it’s so easy a question, I’m going to let my driver answer it.”

“His brother was worse.”

“It is. It isn’t. It is. It isn’t…”

“A gritty pearl is Michael L.L.D.”

“Holy cow, look at all those fucking Indians!”

Gimme a beer and a mop.