What??? They gave me a chihuahua?!?!
It’s running down my leg
Little boys’ pants, half-off!
[hold thumb and index finger out] because they’ve been told their whole lives this is foot long.
It’s the First Lady’s handwriting.
BANG! Okay, he’s dead. What do I do next?
“…Pinocchio?”
In Japan we call it carp to carp walleting.
[pause] “She’s on the roof.”
“Will the defendant please rise?”
Whatever you do, don’t push the button marked “TR”
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There was no punchline.
…because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
A big red rock eater.
No soap radio.
“Sincerely, Dick Van Dyke.”
Oh, I thought you said you became a Protestant.
Are we playing golf, or are we playing silly buggers?
Sam and Janet Evening.
So the rabbi snatches up both tens and leaves a check for thirty dollars.