Should I shave the goatee?
Should I listen to Live aus Berlin or Sehnsucht?
SARS or syphilis?
Chinese food or chicken burger for lunch today?
DISCLAIMER: While I try to provide timely responses to these pressing problems, sometimes it just doesn’t happen (like while I’m sleeping). I apologize to anyone whose life was adversely affected by my failure to communicate this earlier.
Kelly green, of couse. And you call yourself an elf.
Lab report.
Mmmmm, candy.
If you stayed up waiting for my response last night, the decision was pretty much made for you. For the future, try to avoid doing anything that includes the word “reasonable”.
If you’re still up waiting for my answer, you should now fall asleep at work.
Half a dozen of the other, definitely.
Again, I apologize for the delay in my answer. You should’ve had it then, but if it’s still sitting out, throw it away.
Not arbitrary. SARS can kill you, and there is no known cure. Syphilis is easily treatable. Also, you’ll have more fun getting syphilis.
Chinese food. Yum.
Actually, the arbitrary nature of your judgement was not in question. I was challenging the arbitrary nature of the question, as there established rules about how to dress fashionably. I would point you to Susannah and Trinny of What Not to Wear, but it could be argued that their rules are just as arbitrary as yours. So I won’t. I will however, say that if you chose your clothes arbitrarily, you probably don’t look good. 
Scylla or Charybdis?
If I may: Scylla. He’s a hoot!
Feel free to jump right in (especially if you have a cool user name and have basically been lurking for 2 years). The beauty of the truly arbitrary decision is that one person’s is as good as another’s.
lainaf, I can’t tell if you’re truly being amiable and conciliatory or if you’re telling me to butt the hell out. I apologize if I’ve stepped on toes. 
How could I have been any nicer about it? Seriously, was my reply (unintentionally) snarky in any way?
Not to my eye.
This thread is wonderful. How much time in my life have I spent agonizing over truly meaningless decisions. What a relief.
lainaf, I would also like to know what to eat for my mid-morning meal. Egg rolls or corndog and fries?
No, no, no. I apologize. You have to understand…I teach highschoolers and am used to sarcasm. I must have inserted a sarcastic voice, myself. I am just too accostomed to snarkiness IRL. Again, my profound apologies. That’s the pitfall of a written medium. Again, so so sorry.
In lainaf’s place, I arbitrarily forgive you.
I’m really hurting for an answer here. I’m flip-flopping like mad and it’s driving me nuts. Anybody?
Egg rolls and fries.
Can’t get much better than that.
Wow, egg rolls and fries sounds like a little greasy piece of heaven, right now. Wish I hadn’t missed lunch…
Should I visit my parents over Memorial Day weekend, or Columbus Day weekend (they live 9 hours away)?
Go see the folks on Columbus Day. On Memorial Day, go ride a roller coaster.
Egg rolls and fries. You were right!
Bowcaster or laser-carbine?
Both are priced the same…
If you are a Wookie, the Bowcaster; otherwise, go with the laser-carbine.