Let's Update Commercials I Hate

I want to cut the butts off of the Cricket phone people. Seeing adolescents perform craptastic Aretha Franklin impressions of Otis Redding’s “Respect” in youtube-esque collages was the most annoying commercial I had seen in a long time - until I saw their new one which features a teen girl dancing on the dining room table singing the same overdone song while kicking shit at her parents.

I have no idea what the Cricket phone people do, but I don’t want them doing it any more.

At no extra charge I will throw in a radio commercial: 1-877-Kars for Kids. Holy Christ the repetitiveness of this annoying jingle makes the vomitus rise in my throat and it has assured that I will never EVER donate my kar, truck or boat to them no matter how many kids it would help.

In case they thought I was on the fence about it, the jingle now comes in “rock” and “reggae” versions further solidifying my “not helping kids” stance.

Where’s the Tylenol?

Lionel Coin Bank!
Lionel Coin Bank!
Lionel Coin Bank!

Holy fuck on a stick, it’s almost annoying enough to make the Head On! commercials seem appealing!

Absolutely, this is the commercial which I hate the most (currently). The teen randomly gets up and climbs on the table - unprovoked - kicking a glass of water at her dad (who miraculously catches it). The dancing is so awkward and random, I can’t stand it. And I don’t get the “respect” theme. I get “freedom” - if they chose a song about that it would make sense, because you’re ostensibly free to call/text whenever and to whomever you choose. And I get the “respect” theme in response to the CSA on the phone giving you crap. But what did the parents do to have their bratty little spawn traipse on their dining table?

The most disturbing thing is not the Children of the Corn saying the name of the product over and over but the grandpa crotch, as made clear in this remix.

There’s a commercial for a wireless carrier (Verizon, Sprint, or somebody) where there’s a family in an ice cream shop, and they show a cup of ice cream with a few candy sprinkles on it, which are supposed to represent the number of callers that the “other guys” allow you to call free of charge. Then the dad grabs a big container of the sprinkles, and dumps it on the ice cream, which represents how many callers this carrier allows you to call.

This commercial makes my skin crawl. And it has nothing to do with the acting, or how the product is presented. It’s only because of that big pile of sprinkles. That’s it. And I’m not a clean freak or anything, but I need to turn the channel when this commercial comes on.

Heh. Believe it or not, this is the first time I’ve seen this commercial. Previously, I’ve just heard it because I’m working at my desk in the dining room while one of my kids has the TV on in the next room!

Generally, when this commercial comes on, I make them either change the channel or mute the TV, since the commercial makes me all stabby and stuff.

Creepy, creepy, creepy.

The Mega Cheetos commercials,or any other commercial, that shows a close up of shoving food in a mouth.Specially when I am eating.

And the one with …I think it was Speed Stick deordorant… that asks “Whats your pit style?” Not an imagine I want to think of.

My first cross-post!

Have you see that new Prius commercial? The car is driving around a planet which is completely coated with squirming people in different colored costumes, representing grass, flowers, rivers, etc. It’s towing a “sun” which is also wriggling with (yellow) people.

God, it’s nightmarish! It makes me think of Larry Niven’s short story Bordered In Black, wherein an entire continent is asquirm with wall-to-wall people. Or that episode of Star Trek, when Kirk gets a glimpse of the horrifically crampacked, overpopulated planet through a window. It must touch a phobia somewhere inside me.

I hate this commercial. And yet when it comes on, I stare with gobsmacked horror and nausea. What’s wrong with me?

Am I the only one who thinks that when the dad says “Then these …” he sounds like Bullwinkle (“Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat”)?

**Joseph! A! Banks! One! Day! Sale! Every! Suit! Or! Sport! Jacket! Buy! One! Get! One! Free!

[munchkin voice, singing] Yippee-I-Yaay! Mini-Sirloin Burrrgerrrrs! [/munchkin voice]

That song is such an earworm for me and I can’t stand it!

Captain Morgan Rum. I hate every braying jackass in every obnoxious commercial. Not to mention that a bottle of same has been found in the wreckage of half the drunk driving crashes around here, according to a friend who’s a cop.

Subway Five Dollar Foot Long Song n’ Dance. I know they want to impress the concept of Foot Long Sandwiches For Five Dollars, through endless repetition, upon Us. So I see an endless parade of amateurish doofuses belting out some inane and unmemorable jingle like they’re auditioning for Broadway.

Oh, and another one is a deodorant commercial that’s been playing before movies at my nearest theater. It’s about a guy who sweats profusely from his armpits. As in, when he lifts his arm a gushing fountain of sweat spews from his pits and soaks whomever is standing within five feet.


“You’re not thinking with your dipstick, Jimmy!”

I’d like to take a baseball bat to his dipstick, jimmy, willie and any other body part I can mash into a bloody smear.

CRICKET is very annoying I will agree.

Soccer mom driving a bunch of kids in car, breaks out singing the lamest ‘song’ in the history of TV commercials, squirming like she’s peeing her pants, while kids look on silently in horror… “I WANNA GO TO FRIENDLYYYYYYYS…WOOOO!” (I’ve done the same thing, but singing along to a great song, not a greasy spoon ad!) I want to smack her one and tell her to Shut. Up. and drive.

I hate every commercial Geico has put out, that I can immediately think of. Fucking gecko. He was fine before he started speaking. Now I’m extra pissed that he’s still appearing in commercials despite the recent one with that guy doing a “trust exercise” and apparently falling and crushing him. How I envisioned his demise with a grin many a time.

Cell phone commercials also rarely don’t make me want to stab someone.

Actually, most commercials at all make me want to stop someone.

Except Flo. :wink:

The gecko has always spoke- in his very first appearance, he commented on how he was irritated that people confused him for Geico. (Seeing as he appears to work for the company now, I assume he no longer has that problem.)

In that case, I’ve always hated him. :stuck_out_tongue:

Seriously! The blissed out kid just goes “You want whipped cream?” I’d be sayin’ “I am NOT cleanin’ that shit up!”

The one really getting my goat lately is for (I think) the prescription pain reliever Lyrica where a woman describes how much it helps with her fibromyalgia pain and out of nowhere says “And it’s NOT an anti-depressant!” WTF? Why would it be? And god forbid someone should be on an anti-depressant! The way it’s phrased and crammed in there for no reason is really surreal.