Oh f*ck these are making me laugh so hard I am almost crying.
Grits in the morning
Swimming in the cee-ment pond
Don’t call me Jethro
I own a pickup
It was made by Chevrolet
It has lots of rust
Donna works at home
People call her for tarot
I get SSI.
I’m on the tee-vee!
I ain’t a star or nothing.
I passed out on it.
sounds like most of y’all
writin up these here haikus
done been on Springer
I stole a TV
Maybe it was not wise there
In police station?
Just got elected
The first thing I’m gonna do?
Free guns for felons!
It didn’t smell good
But I ate it anyway.
Now I’ve got the shits.
Huh huh! You fuckers
Can’t stop laughing at you guys
Pass the thinner…
Boone’s Farm: a fine wine.
Goes good with hot dogs and Kools.
Run out? Huff spray paint.
WWF,
TN*hippy
Kill my landlord
C - I - L - L my landlord
Kill my landlord
I’m a good Christian
My letter to editor:
Send all towel-heads back!
Shit, where are my keys?
I remember! I left them
In the Oval Office.
Oh God, the wit.
Don’t blame me, I voted for flup
Bill and Hillary?
Be polite. Lady’s name first.
That makes ** Hillbilly**
When I was a kid
I ate dirt in my backyard…
I think it was dirt…
Mad Dog goes well with
Barbecued possum and squirrel.
Roadkill Cafe rules!
I tried to fight him,
Beer bottle upside the head.
Whoops! Here comes his clan!
Wrestling, KFC.
Peach Schnapps chased with malt liquor.
This must be Heaven.
yup,
TN*longhairedfreakazoid
Cleaning my rifle
Did I empty the chamber?
I’ll peer down and see…
I grin with bare gums,
A trail of tobacco juice
Running down my chin
Six fingers have I
And one thumb (counting both hands)
Guess I’ll fail shop class
My mom and my aunt
Are one and the same you see;
Uncle Dad said so.