This thread is alot like my childhood memories of visits to Granma.
egg 
Ender23 was a loathsome spotted reptile (acknowledgements to Peter Cook, R.I.P.) but this 24 chap? Never heard of him. yawn
Yo mama.
Wow.
OK, some of you suck. Some of you are cool. Some of you couldn’t flame me if you threw me into the sun.
Miller you are a fantastical bastard.
SPOOFE, was that a demand?
I don’t regret any of it. I could use a bit of water and maybe some coffee though…
Arthur misses you.
Enderw24, you are such a n00b!
Jane says she never wants to communicate with you again.
Well, according to this guy, you’re totally screwed.
Oh, wait. That’s Endor.
Let me tell you about Amway.
It changed my life.
Regards,
Shodan
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
Actually Ender, I have no feelings for or about you one way or the other. It would neither sadden nor gladden me to hear you had been beheaded in a bizarre accident involving a bookstore burning up on reentry. I just don’t care.
Looks like Ender is trolling to me.
My cat claims that while you were a guest in our house, you licked his anus.
I love you Cranky. And I can neither confirm, nor deny, that rumor.
I have a list, but I left it in my other pants.
Okay.
As a result of you hitting "Submit’ a kitten died, a puppy was cruelly set upon by a pack of pit bulls, and the Internet was overloaded, causing three hundred Amber Alerts to get lost in cyberspace, with the consequence that those three hundred kids will never be reunited with their families.
I can continue, if you wish.
My favorite science fiction universe can beat the pants off your favorite science fiction universe. 
I thought God killed kittens because of … you know …
He had it coming! What with that perky ass waving in the air like that, the cat was too raunchy to keep alive. It had to take a lickin’.
OK, now THIS post I’m gonna regret…
You’re going for that record again, are you? 